Wednesday, August 31, 2022
Column 615
Girls, Geezers and Greece
First, let me extend heartfelt thanks to everybody who recently sent notes to wish me a happy 40th birthday. I particularly appreciated the perfumed letters (and photos) from Bar Refaeli, Elin Nordegren and Heidi Klum. To kick off the day, I had chocolate cake for breakfast and threw my usual three darts to predict how the day would go. I hit two ones and a five.
In case you haven’t heard, the Old Dart Coach, Howie Reed, and his “Committee” (Lisa Farrell, Connie Sroka, Jerry Feather, Russ “The Legend” Lopez, Ron Deane, David Miller and Wayne Roewer) are throwing a “Geezer Gathering” at the Tuscany in Las Vegas this coming January 20-21. Formally billed as the “First Annual Darters of the Golden Age (1975-2000) Reunion” and being held that same date at the ADO’s Las Vegas Open, the bash is certain to be a hit.
To plagiarize Howie, “’The Committee’” would like to thank ADO VP Matt Stoner for his helping hand. Jen Mounts of A-Z Darts pitched in as well as A-Z owner John Baxter, a player in the Golden Age of Darts.”
“Preliminary plans call for a Friday evening adjustment hour (or hours) with golden elixir and aiming fluid available. Saturday evening may feature a fun dart event run by Jerry Feather which may be a chance for revenge on the stars of the Golden Age that had us signing cards and chalking.” It’s rumored that David Irete is working on something special, which hopefully will involve Vanna White.
As of this writing and with five months still to the event date, some 75 people are already confirmed – it’s expected 150-175 will make the trip. Contact Dartoid’s World (Dartoid1@hotmail.com) or message the Old Dart Coach (Mrwonderful98@hotmail.com) with your name and email address if you are likely to attend. It should be a great time (and if for some reason you get bored you can always mosey over to the Las Vegas Open and get autographs from the ADO board members who have been scamming players and leagues for years).
Recently, I was in Greece (Athens and Kefalonia) for meetings. I had hoped to meet up with PDC professional John Michael but that didn’t work out. So, I walked about 8 blocks from my hotel to the Acropolis instead. There was no dartboard there.
On the way, I eavesdropped on a couple of old men, Greek and Italian, arguing about the history and the splendors of Athens and Rome.
The Greek man says, “Look, all I’m saying is that the Greeks invented everything the Romans get credit for!”
The Italian says, “Yes, may be, but the Romans improved it and made it useful!”
The Greek man says, “We invented the Democracy!”
The Italian says, “We realized the challenge of direct elections and the benefit of the legislature, and thus created the Republic!”
The Greek man says, “Yes, but we created beautiful architecture like the Parthenon!”
The Italian says, “And we improved your building techniques, and used them to create aqueducts and structures that stood for centuries longer!”
The Greek man, frustrated, finally says, “Ah, of course. But the Greeks, we INVENTED lovemaking!”
The Italian man stops a moment to think, then says…
“That may be true, but WE introduced it to women!”
One the way back to my hotel I met a pretty girl. She asked my name…
I was delighted to learn that in Ancient Greek my last name translates to “Attractive to women”.
Unfortunately, my first name translates to “Not very”.
Finally, CONGRATULATIONS are due to Michelle Dorsey who, following in her father, the late Jim Poliquin’s footsteps, continues the National Darts Hall of Fame tradition and tournament. Jim would be so very proud!
From the Field,
Dartoid
