Tuesday, July 13, 2021
Column 601
WAKE UP!  SEE THE LIGHT!

If you are a league that is still sending dues to the ADO or a player who attends tournaments “sanctioned” by the ADO (and hence adding funds to their coffers via a surcharge on your entry fees) and you are not aware of the following you should be.

The ADO does not deserve league and player support!

Why can YOU not understand?

How can YOU make apologies for and continue to throw money at an organization that will not accept any ethical or moral responsibility to share with the leages and players WHO FUND THEM – to share with YOU – how funds are spent?

It’s mindboggling.

YOU are all that is standing in the way of the long overdue dissolution of this embarrassment to darts in America.

Many leagues have (long ago) seen the light.  Those below haven’t.  The question is WHY?

WAKE UP!  SEE THE LIGHT!

From the Field,

Dartoid

_____________________________________________

Akron Canton Dart Club, Inc. ACDC 4-6 Massillon OH
All Island Dart Tour AIDT 5-3 Hicksville NY
Amarillo Dart Association AMAR 3-5 Amarillo TX
Arizona Darts League AZL 2-3 Phoenix AZ
Autism Speaks Darts Inc ASDI 4-6 Hubbard OH
Blueberry Hill Darts Association BHDA 6-2 St. Louis MO
Caprock Dart Association CPRCK 3-5 Lubbock TX
Carolina Darts Association CARNC 5-6 Apex NC
Central Maine Dart League CMEDL 5-1 Auburn ME
Central Missouri Dart Association CMO 6-2 Jefferson City MO
Cleveland Darter Club Tn. Darters CDCTD 4-6 Middleburg Heights OH
Club 401 FOUR 2-2 Brea CA
Club Dart Central CLUBDC 6-2 Des Moines IA
Colorado Springs Dart League CSDL 2-5 Colorado Springs CO
Columbia Dart Association CLMMO 6-2 Columbia MO
Concho Valley Dart Association CNCHO 3-5 San Angelo TX
Dart Players Nashville DPN 4-2 Hendersonville TN
Dart Players of Alaska DPAK 1-1 Anchorage AK
Dart Players of Springfield DPS 6-5 Urbana MO
Dart Professionals of the West DPW 2-5 Denver CO
Dart Women of the West DWW 2-5 Denver CO
DartsMississippi.org DMS 3-3 Vancleave MS
Delta Dart League DLTA 1-3 Winters CA
Dixie Dart Association DIXIE 3-3 Vancleave MS
Emerald City Darting Organization ECDO 1-2 Seattle WA
Florida Dart Association Inc. FLA 4-5 Lauderhill FL
Fort Worth Dart Association FWDA 3-2 Ft. Worth TX
Genesee Valley Dart Association Inc GVDA 5-2 Rochester NY
Golden Triangle Darts League GTTX 3-1 Nederland TX
Greater Chattanooga Darting Association GCDA 4-2 Chattanooga TN
Greater Jackson Darts Association GJDA 3-3 Jackson MS
Greater Louisville Darting Association GLDA 4-1 Louisville KY
Greater Nashville Darting Association GNDA 4-2 Nashville TN
Greater San Diego Darting Association GSDDA 2-2 San Diego CA
Juneau Dart Group JUN 1-1 Juneau AK
Kenai Darts Association KDA 1-1 Kenai AK
Kodiak Island Dart Association KIDA 1-1 Kodiak AK
Lake Erie Dart Association Inc LEDA 4-6 Mentor OH
Lawton Ft. Sill Dart Association LFSDA 6-5 Lawton OK
LB Darts/Viking Pro Darts LBVIK 5-3 Plainview NY
Liberal Club Dart League LCDL 5-1 Fall River MA
Mat-Su Dart Association MATSU 1-1 Big Lake AK
Metroplex Darts Association MTRPX 3-2 Arlington TX
Minute Man Dart League MMDL 5-1 Danvers MA
Mississippi Gulf Coast Dart Association MGCDA 3-3 DIberville MS
Mississippi Valley Darting Organization MVDO 6-2 Maryland Heights MO
Natrona Country Darting Association NCDA 2-5 Casper WY
New Mexico Dart Association NMX 2-4 Rio Rancho NM
Northern Colorado Dart Association NOCO 2-5 Frederick CO
OK City Darters Association OKCDA 6-5 Oklahoma City OK
Pacific Darts Association PACDA 2-2 Huntington Beach CA
Pecos Valley Dart Association PECOS 2-4 Roswell NM
Pittsburgh Darters PITT 4-6 Mt. Lebanon PA
Portland Area Dart Association PADA 1-2 Portland OR
Queen City Darting Association (NC) QNNC 5-6 Charlotte NC
Rocket City Dart Association ROCK 4-2 Huntsville AL
Rocky Mountain Dart Association Inc. RMDA 2-5 Denver CO
Sacramento Valley Darting Association SACV 1-3 Elk Grove CA
Savannah Area Darting Association SADA 4-3 Savannah GA
Seacoast Dart Association SEAC 5-1 Sanford ME
South TX United Pro Independent Darts STU 3-1 San Antonio TX
Southern Nevada Dart Association SNV 2-3 Las Vegas NV
Spartanburg County Dart Organization SCDO 4-3 Spartanburg SC
Stones River Dart Association SRVR 4-2 Lavergne TN
Syracuse Classic League (Salt City) SALT 5-2 Syracuse NY
Tidewater Area Darting Association TADA 5-4 Norfolk VA
Topeka Dart Association TPKA 6-2 Topeka KS
Tournament Of Champions Directors TOCD 1-3 Winters CA
Valdez Dart Association VALDEZ 1-1 Valdez AK
W.A.D.S. WADS 6-5 Wichita KS
Washington Area Dart Association WADA 5-4 Arlington VA
West Texas Dart Association WTEX 3-5 Amarillo TX
Western Carolina Darts Association WCDA 5-6 Weaverville NC
Wichita Dart Association WDA 6-5 Wichita KS
Youngstown Dart Association Inc. YNDA 4-6 Youngstown OH

Friday, June 25, 2021
Column 600
EIGHTEEN YEARS!

It been more than 18 years since the American Darts Organization has shared a financial report.

REPEAT: EIGHTEEN YEARS!

With all the social media discussion recently (and the Old Dart Coach, Howie Reed’s recent column) about whether that ADO has filed for bankruptcy (and the “defense” by some that the organization has no obligation to share its finances with “non-employees” – whatever that means) it’s worth noting that those who promulgate such an argument are (how do I put this diplomatically?) smokin’ the fucking drapes!

There are at least two reasons…

First, the ADO bylaws require (or used to) an annual financial disclosure (maybe they changed their bylaws – it’s not as if they followed many of their rules in any case).  Second, as an IRS designated charity they are (or were until their status was revoked) required to file an annual return (of course, it’s old news that they didn’t for years – hence the revocation).

The bottom line: while with (possibly) changed bylaws and (possibly) no status with the IRS a technical argument MIGHT be made that the ADO, currently, has no formal requirement to disclose finances, one would think that even the organization’s most ardent supporters would appreciate that the organization has an ethical and moral responsibility to share how funds are spent with the leagues and players WHO FUND THEM!

Don’t buy into the sleight of hand, tapdancing, bullshit and lies.  Educate yourself!  The ADO magic show has been headlining for years.

What follows is old (from 2014) but possibly worth your time to read.  If you’re a league and still paying ADO dues – you’re out of your mind.  You’re being ripped off.  If you’re a player planning to attend an ADO “sanctioned” (whatever that means these days) tournament where a couple dollars of your entry fees go to support the ADO – don’t attend.  You’re being ripped off.

Leagues and players: you’ll benefit no less by sending your money to Bernie Madoff (and he’s dead!).

The ADO is and has long been an embarrassment to the sport in this country, and beyond.  It weasels money from leagues and players in gives them diddly in return.  STOP supporting the ADO.  They do not deserve to exist another day.

______________________________________________________________

Where there’s smoke there’s fire.

Right now, smoke is billowing about the private ADO “empire” like at Hamas House on a crisp mid-summer’s eve.

There are embers too.  Lots of embers.  And there’s a crowd around the campfire…

A few are trying to keep the embers cool, attempting to stop them from bursting into a raging fire.  What do they want to hide?

Others are pounding my e-mail in-box with information about ADO goings-on.  The information – much of it still not corroborated – is astonishing.

It has now been 24 hours since I sent the following message to the ADO’s chief financial officer, Lloyd Hoover.  I also posted it to the Darts Discussion Group so that others – particularly ADO officials – would be aware.  There has been no response, not from anyone in authority.  Perhaps Hoover is on vacation.  Perhaps his e-mail is on the fritz.  Perhaps he has been told not to reply.  In fairness, 24 hours isn’t a lot of time…

August 5, 2014

Mr. Hoover…

Respectfully, as CFO for the American Darts Organization might I ask that you e-mail me a copy of the most recent financial statement for the organization?  I am working on a column for September 1 and would like to refer to the most recent numbers available.  Thank you.

Paul Seigel (aka Dartoid)

When more than one person knows a secret – or many secrets – it is only a matter of time before everybody knows.  The money trail is often illuminating.  How much is the ADO taking in?  How are they spending it?  Why won’t they say?

Are funds missing?

Again, my e-mail is buzzing.  Some of those who ADO officials may think – may have long thought – are protecting secrets, and friends, are not.

My aim is not to bring the ADO down.  My aim is to see it fixed (and I still firmly believe that current president, David Hascup, is trying).  But I fear his efforts are being thwarted by some of the very people with secrets to hide.

Let me also be clear: I also have no reason to believe Lloyd Hoover has anything but the best of intentions.  I do not know him, but I am told he is an honest stand-up guy.

I feel the same about Hascup.

But if the ADO cannot be fixed, I submit the organization should be dismantled and reconstituted via fair and representative elections with a governing body and squeaky-clean financial transparency – which represent all the dues-paying members (not just the handful who chase points) and leagues the way they should expect to be represented.

For background, take a moment to read the following two columns:

• http://dartoidsworld.net/2014/07/column-465-can-the-american-darts-organization-be-saved
• http://dartoidsworld.net/2014/08/column-467-if-i-were-president-of-the-american-darts-organization

Then, if you care and have information, I encourage you to get it to me.  Your name will be held in the strictest confidence.

My e-mail address is: Dartoid1@verizon.net.

From the Field,

Dartoid

Friday, May 21, 2021
Column 599
The World Seniors Dart Championship deserves massive support.  And Larry Butler!

To quote the greatest of them all, darts fans should be “over the moon” at news of the upcoming World Seniors Darts Championship.  I certainly am.

But then I’d much rather watch an old Ali-Frasier fight than any of today’s crop of boxers (except Manny Pacquiao).  I’d much prefer to watch a rerun of Arnold Palmer and Jack Nicklaus battling it out until the final putt than any of the current names I’ve never even heard of.  I’d rather watch a video of the 1994 World Matchplay – for the hundredth time – than anything Michael van Gerwin does.

In fact, were I forced to choose between watching the Premier League (as great as it is) and this competition among the legends, gentlemen (and women) and ambassadors who paved the way for so many of those who today whine their way to the board and back it would be a no-brainer.

It’s just sad that the likes of Eric Bristow, Jocky Wilson, Barry Twomlow, Stacy Bromberg and others are not still with us.

And it’s a TRAVESTY that Larry Butler hasn’t been invited.  Well, yet.

Twenty of the 24 spots for players 50 years old and older have been filled – with two more invites coming soon to others who have made “special achievements on the darts circuit in the past.”

How can Butler not be invited?  What do you think, Dennis Priestley?

Then, in November the final two spots will be determined in a qualification tournament.  Except for two considerations I’d give it a go myself: 1) I suck, and 2) I’m only 38.

Still, Butler or no Butler, the concept – “a joint venture between MODUS Sports and Jason Francis, who transformed his Snooker Legends exhibition tour into a global circuit” is BRILLIANT.  No doubt this will evolve into a tour that will fill up arenas around the world.

The event which is expected to take place early next February comes with a $25,000 check for the winner – but this is insignificant compared to the potential of the concept.

Imagine, in one room – Anderson, Deller, Fordham, George, Gulliver, Lim, Lowe, Manley, Part, Priestley, Taylor and more.

Twenty-four of the best ever.

Like Ali, Marciano, Dempsey, Frasier, Foreman, Mayweather, Pacquiao, Ruth, DiMaggio, Gehrig, Cobb, Bird, Chamberlain, Jordan, Johnson, Russell, Bryant, Abdul-Jabbar, Woods, Palmer, Nicklaus, Sneed, Hogan, Pelé, Maradona, Spitz and Phelps – FIRST NAMES JUST AIN’T NECESSARY.  Even little old biddies can probably identify most of these greats.

That’s what these darts players have meant to our sport.

The World Seniors Darts Championship deserves massive support.  And Larry Butler!

From the Field,

Dartoid

Friday, May 14, 2021
Column 598
Goodbye old friends…

I am posting this column again because some people have asked me why I have blocked them…

Darts and politics don’t mix!  Not in my world anyway…

“For some time, I have been working on a column, struggling really,” I wrote to a friend recently.

Writer’s block?  No.  I never have a problem putting words to paper.

It’s worse…

Although I don’t throw competitively much these days most of my closest friendships date to the many years I was deeply involved – four or five nights a week at league or blind draws, weekends at tournaments.  What I cherished most during all those years was the one constant: it was always about the darts.

We could and did talk to death every conceivable darts-related subject.

We didn’t know what each other did for a living.

We didn’t know who was rich or poor.

We certainly didn’t know anything about each other’s politics.

We didn’t care!

Darts was about darts.  And beer.

This was special.  We had the sport in common and that was pure.  That was enough.

Facebook and the past 10-12 years of political division have changed all of this.  I hate it.

Today, I will begin what I have resisted for so long, not wanted to do.

Everyone is entitled to their opinions.  But the only opinions I care about from darts friends are opinions about darts.

Effective today, any “friend” who shares a political opinion (whether I agree or not) which shows up on my newsfeed or in any darts forum to which I belong will be unfriended or blocked or whatever.

Enough is enough of all this hatred.

From the field,

Dartoid

Tuesday, March 9, 2021
Column 597
Step #1 – Getting to the pub!

Under normal circumstances the act of going down to the pub for a few beers and a night at the oche is a simple maneuver.  You grab your darts, the keys to the car and roll.  You then drink too much, throw too long and spend the drive home constructing a creative excuse for why you’re about to walk in the door an hour past the time told your spouse to expect you.  “Damn, honey, I was hot tonight.  Couldn’t miss.  Won six bucks.  Here — go buy yourself a new outfit.”

For some, and for reasons I simply cannot comprehend, this seemingly simple routine takes on a complexity that is downright mysterious.  Take for example my friend Tommy Molina who routinely shows up absent some his darts.  Not all of them mind you — just one, or two.  How such a thing can happen, and happen regularly, to me anyway, is no less strange than forgetting to step into your underwear in the morning.  And Tommy has this problem too.  Seriously, this is a guy that just plain shouldn’t drink.

And then there’s my buddy Phil Hoods who has no problem with the basic process.  He hops into the car, tosses his darts onto the passenger seat, always arrives early — and then spends a good ten minutes trying to then find his darts among the piles of beer cans and crumpled Marlboro packages that comprise the interior decorating scheme of his car.  Once, and I swear this is true, Phil couldn’t find his darts for an entire season.  Was convinced someone stole them until he discovered them swallowed up somewhere in the back seat of his Honda.

In Dartoid’s World remembering the darts ain’t the problem.  It’s the getting to the game part that’s often more complicated than the game itself is worth.  This currently comes to mind as I head to Indonesia for a night out with some guy I met on the Internet.  I’m heading to a bar that I have no name or address for.  It’s close to a hotel called the Nikko, as if that helps.  Or as if it matters — I’m still more than a day away.

I’m at the airport in Zurich as I write.  Some twenty hours ago I left my home and my wife and my dog and my sanity behind.  I haven’t slept.  I’ve eaten airline garbage.  Watched Air Bud.  And memorized the better part of the Swiss Air Gazette in-flight magazine.  There’s an interesting article about how the big hotel chains are going about courting women, expected to comprise fifty percent of all business travelers by the year 2000.  One nifty idea is that they’re stocking rooms with cotton balls.  Not that I doubt this is a stroke of genius that someone should be paid big bucks for (my wife buys about a billion of the puffs a year) but just what do women do with these things anyway?

Coming off the escalator en route to a fourteen-hour layover in the transit lounge I was nearly sucked into the earth when my shoelace got stuck between the disappearing steps of the machine.  As I struggled to free my foot a rotund French woman cursed me as she squeezed past my predicament.  I had unhappy thoughts.

Presently I am sitting in a little restaurant contemplating a plate of cheese chunks (choix de fromages sur assiette) and an uncarbonated coke with no ice (Europeans have some sort of mental block about ice).  I long for more airplane garbage.  I want to throw darts.  And now that my foot is free my greatest desire is to hunt down the escalator lady and kick her in her fat French derriere.

In some eight hours I’ll begin the next ten-hour segment of my trip.  My route takes me over Turkey and Iraq, Afghanistan and India.  The Black Sea, the Caspian Sea, the Arabian Sea and the Bay of Bengal.  I’m thinking of flushing every toilet on the plane as we skirt the Teheran airspace.  It’s long past time someone finished the work George Bush left incomplete.

Following another couple hour layover in Bangkok, a quick hop to Singapore and yet another layover, and a few more hours in the air I’ll land in Indonesia and begin to chart my way to the center of Jakarta to find my game.  This, of course, is assuming that my darts, which are packed in my luggage, also manage to find their way to the end of this nightmare of a journey.

And, if they don’t show up, well… just call me Tommy or Phil.

From the Field,

Dartoid

Wednesday, January 20, 2021
Column 596
Darts and politics DON’T MIX!

“For some time, I have been working on a column, struggling really,” I wrote to a friend recently.

Writer’s block?  No.  I never have a problem putting words to paper.

It’s worse…

Although I don’t throw competitively much these days most of my closest friendships date to the many years I was deeply involved – four or five nights a week at league or blind draws, weekends at tournaments.  What I cherished most during all those years was the one constant: it was always about the darts.

We could and did talk to death every conceivable darts-related subject.

We didn’t know what each other did for a living.

We didn’t know who was rich or poor.

We certainly didn’t know anything about each other’s politics.

We didn’t care!

Darts was about darts.  And beer.

This was special.  We had the sport in common and that was pure.  That was enough.

Facebook and the past 10-12 years of political division have changed all of this.  I hate it.

Today, I will begin what I have resisted for so long, not wanted to do.

Everyone is entitled to their opinions.  But the only opinions I care about from darts friends are opinions about darts.

Effective today, any “friend” who shares a political opinion (whether I agree or not) which shows up on my newsfeed or in any darts forum to which I belong will be unfriended or blocked or whatever.

Enough is enough of all this hatred.

From the field,

Dartoid

Photo by Jønne Rantzau from Burst

Thursday, December 31, 2020
Column 595
Goodbye 2020!  Hello 2021!

My plans for welcoming the New Millennium were set 26 years ago (now 47!) in Kalamazoo, Michigan.  In fact, when the beer ran out and as the sun began to cast its glow across the snow on the first morning of 1974, my roommates and I took the opportunity to plan our entire lives.  We then scarfed down some cold pizza and threw up.

Bob was going to make millions after he graduated, passed his CPA exam and became a Partner with Price Waterhouse.  Tim didn’t care if he graduated – the way he had it figured a diploma wasn’t a prerequisite for becoming a touring tennis pro. Ken was going to marry his high school sweetheart, Patty, and dip into his trust fund to buy a house on a lake, a fast car and have a family.  Poncho planned to move back to his native Venezuela, marry a pretty girl and return some day as a member of the foreign service.

I was going to follow in the footsteps of my hero at the time, Richard Nixon, and run for Congress.  Then, once we had all made our mark on the world, we were going to reunite for one last New Year’s Eve blowout.  Tonight.  December 31, 1999.  A long time ago.  The mother of all parties.

Sadly, as with so many things in life, our plans just didn’t work out.

My relationship with Bob has been strained ever since the day I sent him the video “Deep Throat” for a wedding present.  He says his wife doesn’t appreciate my sense of humor.  Go figure.  Bob is now a partner with Price Waterhouse Coopers in Houston.  He’s got millions.

Ken married Patty, bought the house, several fancy cars and had a big family.  When he isn’t fishing, he manages his trust.

Tim’s life has been a mystery since 1976 when he got kicked off the tennis team for skipping practice to drive to Notre Dame to watch Adrian Dantley play basketball.  The last I heard he was stringing tennis racquets at a country club somewhere in the Miami suburbs.

Poncho ended up hitched to some beauty queen from Wisconsin and has a dream job with Oscar-Meyer.  Basically, he sells hot dogs.

And me – well, I just didn’t know that girl was 14 years old.  No, wait!  That was Chuck Berry.  Seriously, until the Clinton and Trump administrations such “indiscretions” tended to dampen careers.  My problem was that I couldn’t raise the few million dollars required to get elected.  So now, I write a column that no one reads about a sport that gets no respect.

I am content with the course my life has taken.  I’ve got a beautiful wife.  A great kid.  Fluffy dogs.  A house.  A couple of cars.  Four dart boards.  Six sets of darts.  There’s beer in the refrigerator.  Well, there was a few hours ago.  Somebody broke into the house and stole it.  Bastards.

Still, as I sit here at my laptop and as the final minutes of the 20th Century (now 2020) slide into history, I can’t help but reflect.  That’s what you’re supposed to do on New Year’s Eve.  That, get blotto and moon strangers.  Make resolutions.  And predictions.

Yes, my old buddies and I traveled different paths but I’m happy with where mine has taken me.  Congress is for criminals.  I don’t enjoy hooking innocent fish.  Tennis requires exercise.  And while I must admit that I do love hot dogs, I find that Oscar-Meyer has just a tad too many snouts, lips and hair follicles squeezed into their particular brand of intestines.  So, I wouldn’t trade places with Poncho either.

As I contemplate 2021, there are a couple of people’s shoes I wouldn’t mind stepping into for a night, even for just a couple of hours. Twenty years ago, the choice was a no-brainer – Phil Taylor’s shoes would have been on my feet in a flash.  Tomorrow, I would happily wear Michael van Gerwen’s (£500,000 would come in handy).

Next, there are the resolutions…

I resolve to spend more time with my wife – to achieve this I will reduce my nights out throwing darts from five to four.  On second thought I’ll just take her to the bar.

I resolve to drink less Budweiser.  I will switch to Coors.

I resolve to chalk more often.  Oh, screw that.

I resolve to be sensitive and politically correct in all that I write and do.  To accomplish this, I will jettison the words “liar, bullshit,” and “loser” from my vocabulary (unless I am referencing the ADO or convicted sex offenders and plagiarizers with delusions of grandeur.)

Finally, predictions…

Just as my roommates and I did a quarter of a century ago (yep, now heading towards 50 years) I must gaze into the crystal ball.  Unfortunately, the big glitter orb in Times Square is but moments from dropping.  I do not have the time required to fully consider what my life and my darts will be like in the New Year.

So, what I will do is take one dart in my hand.  I will step to the board on the wall in the room where I am typing.  The possibilities for a bright, or not so bright, 2021 range from 60 to a big fat zip.  Are you with me?  Here we go.

Okay.  I’m at the line.  I’m ready…

The ball is dropping… we’re seconds away from the New Year.  A brand-new slate.  League’s startin’ up again in a few days.  The future’s gonna be mine, baby.

I set.  Stroke.  Release…

Oh, shit.

From the Field,

Dartoid