July 5, 2006
Column 260
A Review of Las Vegas Desert Classic 5
“A man in Las Vegas ate 47 grilled-cheese sandwiches in 10 minutes. A few weeks ago, the same guy ate 50 hot dogs. And guess what? Here’s the best part, girls. He’s still single.”
— David Letterman
No, Reggie Horak wasn’t in town for the Professional Darts Corporation’s (PDC) fifth annual Las Vegas Desert Classic (LVDC). Horak is the immediate past president of the National (electronic) Dart Association (NDA) which is, well, speaking of hot dogs, just a bunch of weenies.
I wasn’t in Vegas either and this wasn’t because I’m not pretty good myself at scarfin’ down the weenies or, like Horak and his lap dog Leslie Murphy, don’t know the proper height to hang a dartboard. But WAIT! I digress. This is supposed to be about professional darts.
If you’re a regular reader of this column you’ll know that my wife and I recently experienced a family tragedy. During the second day of the World Series of Darts (WSOD) our goldfish Mammary broke her leg. She’s okay now but it was a horrible thing for my wife to deal with alone. Mammary limped and circled aimlessly about her bowl tripping over the little rocks, pretty much the way I did a few weeks back after Johnny Noe introduced me to the joys of Rumplemint at Chuck and Stick’s 25th annual Chicken Coop Open. (Stay tuned for more on this FANTASTIC tournament, coming August 1.)
Anyway, that’s why this column is coming to you after this year’s LVDC is over. Good husband that I am, I promised to stay close to home for a spell and keep an eye on the mammaries in our house rather than the ones in Vegas.
The tournament has ended and my moles have reported in. What follows is a day-by-day review of the highlights, most of which happened at Mustang Ranch. If you were at the tournament or were lucky enough to be able to follow it live on Sky Television and think you know all the important stuff then bite me and just stop reading now.
Otherwise, tune in tomorrow…
From the Field,
Dartoid
