Sunday, November 1, 2009
Column 378
One year ago, this November, in darts…
Hillary Clinton is elected president!
Well, not quite…
Actually, it is Barack Obama who scores a historic triumph, becoming (in the words of one journalist) “the nation’s first black president since the second season of 24.”
True to his campaign promise to “bring change” to Washington, Obama “begins to assemble an administration consisting of a diverse group of renegade outsiders, ranging all the way from lawyers who attended Ivy league schools and then worked in the Clinton administration to lawyers who attended entirely different Ivy league schools and then worked in the Clinton administration, to…
…Hillary Clinton.”
The stock market nosedives but most of the nation and world are hopeful of better times to come. As bailout funding decisions begin to take shape, some (like the “big three” automakers, insolvent banks, and deep-in-debt insurance companies) are pleased with the generous hand of the New Government.
Others (people who have been foreclosed on by banks and ripped off by insurance companies) take offense. Still others are downright insulted.
For example, when a carefully calculated and very generous bailout check for 14 cents shows up in BDO Supreme Commander Olly Croft’s postbox he returns it to the United States Treasury with a scathing note, to wit: “THE BDO IS NOT FOR SALE! IT IS A PRICELESS ASS!”
Millions of darts fans across the world, including the majority of the BDO’s player members, do not notice the spelling error (that the letters “E” and “T” are missing at the end of the second sentence of Croft’s missive), assuming instead that he was describing himself.
In other darts news, in Frankfurt, Phil Taylor defeats Adrian Lewis (who overcame a cut hand and subsequent hospital visit to get by Austrian Hannes Schnier in the first round) to add the inaugural European Darts Championship to his burgeoning list of victories. Earlier in the tournament Taylor notches the second highest average in the history of televised darts (113.92) to defeat Mervyn King 9-3 en route to the quarter finals.
In a suburb of London, called Ireland, Terry Jenkins beats Andy Jenkins to win the John McEvoy Gold Dart Classic Players Championship title.
Michael van Gerwen wins the Gleneagle Irish Masters.
Mervyn King wins the Dutch Darts Trophy Players Championship over Raymond van Barneveld. And James Wade wins defeats Mark Walsh to take the second of the weekend’s Players Championship events.
Stephen Bunting defeats Daryl Fitton to take the Northern Ireland Open singles title while Francis Hoenselaar overcomes Trina Gulliver to take the women’s cup.
Scott Waites beats Scott Mitchell to win the Swedish Open while Carina Ekberg bests Kristin Bomander in an “all-Swedish affair” among the ladies.
At the Grand Slam of Darts James Wade pounds a perfect second round leg (180, 180, T20, T19, and D12) live on television but sees his opponent, Gary Anderson, advance 10-8 to the quarter finals. Then, despite a 105 average, Anderson falls 16-14 to Terry Jenkins. In the end, it is Phil Taylor who, with a 106 average, collects the Grand Slam victory (and £100,000 first place check) with an 18-9 defeat of Jenkins.
Meanwhile in America, Jimmy Widmayer falls short twice (to Joe Swick in 501 and Chris Linkous in cricket) at the Ghost on the Coast in Myrtle Beach while Lisa Shpritz and Nancy Huntoon score wins. In Alaska, it’s Jeff Olsen, Chad Oleson, Maggie Ludwig, and Lulu Clark who take the honors at the Nome North Open. At the DFW-Metroplex Open in Irving, Texas, Joey Watts and Bill Davis outlast the field while Stacy Bromberg and Christina Medina scores wins for the ladies. Nick Mandrila, Nick Depaynos, Lynda Hinds, and Maggie Martell share top honors at the Tahoe Biltmore in Crystal Bay, Nevada. At the San Diego Memorial Tourney, John Kramer rolls back the clock to win 501 while his other half, Anne, is touched out by Gina Aguero in the ladies final. At the Tamarac, Florida, Turkey Shoot it’s John Beard and Mark Venable with wins for the men and Kate Keathley and Lisa Carmen on top for the women. At the Choo Choo Classic in Chattanooga Garry Green, Jerry Hilbourn, Sandra Bass, and Paula McDaniel take the honors. Brad Wethington, Steve Brown, and Debbie Ivey win at the Route 66 Shootout in Miami, Oklahoma. Dan Moore, Tim Cherven, Debbie Rowe, and Lisa Alpert take the first place money at the Autumn Classic in Aurora, Colorado. Isen Veljic, Shawn Brenneman, C.J. Slater, and Stacy Bromberg win at the Buckeye Open in Columbus, Ohio. Jerry Hilbourn and Brian Blake split at the Greensboro Classic in North Carolina while Trish Jackson sweeps the ladies’ events. At the Sunflower Open in Topeka, Kansas, Steve Brown wins twice while Jessie Thatcher and Michelle Nagle spilt for the ladies. Bob Baechler, Darin Young, Pam Briggs, and Marilyn Popp outlast a large entry at the Long Island Fall Classic. And in Savannah, Georgia, Brian Lamberti and Sean Morehouse split while Krista Heinz scores a double at the Shooter’s One Day Shoot.
Ironically, almost one year to the day, Olly Croft again declines an opportunity – this time to sell his organization outright to Barry Hearn and the PDC for an extraordinary £1 million. Croft dashes off the same message as he did a year earlier when offered government bailout funds: “THE BDO IS NOT FOR SALE! IT IS A PRICELESS ASS!” Again, it is widely assumed that Croft is referring to himself.
October closes with all eyes, except Croft’s, focused on the start of the PDC world championship in mid-December.
From the Field,
Dartoid
