Dartoid

September 1, 1999
Column 78
Santa Claus Throws in Thailand

Without a doubt, the dye was cast the instant Ville Pitkalahti’s message appeared on my computer screen. “You come to Thailand. I show you good darts. We go to Lucky Draw.” Hmmm…

Now, I don’t know about you, but I know a challenge when I …

September 1, 1999
Column 77
Blueberry Hill

It was in Sports Illustrated. I swear it was. In part (and I paraphrase), it read: “While the quirks and cliche’s… are undeniable, it is also undoubtedly a sport, no more eccentric than (others). It places a premium on endurance and precision and calls for (the) application of …

September 1, 1999
Column 76
Idiots, Beets and Chalking

It was in the embarrassing instant after I tossed up my second three in as many trips to the line and as Steve Brown completed the calculus required to determine I was still 495 points away from finishing, that the image of the “Man With No …

August 1, 1999
Column 75
The Darts Spouse

I arrived home a little later than usual last night. My partner and I fought our way to the finals of the local Friday night Luck of the Draw. I parked my car quietly and tiptoed my way into the bedroom where my wife and dog had …

August 1, 1999
Column 74
The Meaning of “Dartoid”

I read with interest Dick Allix’s recent column in Bull’s Eye News — his 128th — and took note of his observation about how difficult it is for him, sometimes, to knock out a few paragraphs of fresh copy. I’ve read Allix’s column for years and …

June 1, 1999
Column 73
Durban, South Africa

If you’re a hot enough shot to be representing one of the thirty or forty countries that will converge in the capital of KuaZula-Natal — Durban, South Africa — this October for the prestigious World Cup, then you’re in luck. I’ve been there. I can help you …

June 1, 1999
Column 72
The Y2K Crisis

As the steel-tip/soft tip debate rages into the next century there is one absolute fact, one indisputable nexus of thought, to which enthusiasts of both veins of our sport can find no argument. That, of course, is that Hillary Clinton should not pose for Playboy.

No, seriously, …

May 1, 1999
Column 71
Toronto, Canada

It was just a couple of months ago that the best game I could find in Toronto was against a fine young homosexual fellow (“not,” to quote Jerry Seinfield, “that there’s anything wrong with that”) named Kevin who dove for his bounceouts. Suffice it to say that I …

March 1, 1999
Column 70
Do Dogs Understand Darts?

It occurred to me recently after reading a Dave Barry commentary about whether dogs watch television that it was far past time to address one of the most vital of life’s mysteries. It’s a question that has perplexed the world’s best thinkers ever since the hairy …

March 1, 1999
Column 69
Throwin’ with “Bones”

Throwin’ with “Bones” is something my old partner, Chris James, and I talked often of doing.

When I’d return from my travels, often with souvenirs — like the spear once used by an Ugandan elephant poacher, which now hangs on the wall in his restaurant — Chris …