Dartoids World


Thursday, November 3, 2022
Column HR377

Long before the Old Dart Coach picked up a dart, he would pick himself up from rodeo arenas across the USA.  He settled on steer wrestling which insured a trip to terra firma – place he was very familiar with trying to ride bulls.  One the baddest bulls of all time was named Bodacious.  In 135 times out he had only been ridden for the required 8 seconds 8 times.  He also was nasty and loved hurting cowboys.

Ladies’ darts has BEAU-DACIOUS.

The wunderkind teenager, Beau Greaves, went through the PDC Women’s Series #13-20 like a tornado through a trailer park in Kansas.

“Toto, we’re not in Kansas anymore.”  For Greaves, the world of darts has been a trailer park in Kansas and she the human tornado.  Next to Beau, Bodacious the bull is an amateur.

Despite not playing the first 12 PDC Women’s events, Greaves still found herself #3 in the Order of Merit after four events.  The top two players would qualify for the PDC World Championships at the end of the year.  Lisa Ashton had the top spot assured (£8,850) although Fallon Sherrock held a slim chance to finish #1.  What Sherrock had to do was defend second place against the hard charging Greaves in third (£4,000).

Greaves, to the surprise of no one, swept all four events last weekend.  That’s eight on the trot – 132 legs won and 48 lost.  Greave’s faced a decider in only one final – that was against Lisa Ashton in event #18.  They had met twice in “majors” this year with each earing a win – Greaves 5-1 and Ashton 4-1.

Like Bodacious the bull, Greaves came out “en fuego” holding in 15, breaking in 13 and leading 2-nil.  Ashton answered with a duo of her own when Greaves was unable to check from 8 with 4 tries.  Trading legs, they were level at 3 and 4.   Greaves had a chance to win 5-3 when she busted 82 allowing Ashton to erase 20.

In the 9th leg Ashton led after 9 darts – tossing T37 to leave 98.  Greaves at 100.  Greaves tossed T20, then missed d20 and d10, leaving 10.  Ashton developed “noodle arm” at 98 leaving 16 but was then without a dart left for shot at double.  Greaves’ d5 brought the curtain down.  Matt Wilson posted that Phil Taylor won 59 pro events in a row.  Greaves is at 42 and counting.

Greaves’ performance overshadowed the return to the oche of Anastasia Dobromyslova.  The brilliant Russian and British dart playing citizen had been away from the game since being “banned” by the World Darts Federation.  Sharing equal shame for the banning are women players that didn’t have the stones to support her.  As one player pointed out, “Dobromyslova collected two quarter finals on the comeback road.”

Mikuru Suzuki’s year has been up and down.  When she was good, she was really good.  Last weekend she was really good – this followed a subpar performance at Lakeside when she left after a second round loss.  Following that loss Suzuki staggered a bit then righted the ship reaching the PDC Women’s finals (13, 14 and 15) before running into Beau Greaves and losing 5-1, 5-2 and 5-3.  She reached two finals last weekend, losing both.  Guess to whom?   Too easy: Beau Greaves 5-1 and 5-3.

Falllon Sherrock had to defend her second place in the Order of Merit for a trip to the PDC World Championships.  Sherrock missed out on the “Pally Trip” by a mere £1,051.   Sherrock lost to Mikuru Suzuki 4-0 earning £50, then suffered a semi loss to Lisa Ashton 5-2 for £400 followed by a final against Ms. Greaves.

Against Greaves, Sherrock was tied at 3 when she was unable to takeout 81, leaving 40.  Greaves causally, as is her demeanor, said adios to T48.  Greaves followed that with a beautiful 11 darter (T40, T40, T40, 81-out).  Sherrock ended the weekend with another loss to Mikuru Suzuki.

Sherrock haters will celebrate her loss of the “Alley Pally” bid.  Those include the Irish Slug, aka “drunken male reproductive organ” who’s stock and trade is hate and filth.

Beau is on her way to the PDC World Championships.  With that decision the WDF #1 ranked women player just issued a “see ya later” to the WDF Lakeside Championships.

Sherrock could still get the one “Ally Pally” spot open.  She missed four series events to fulfill PDC obligations in New Zealand and Australia.  The final weekend, she lost a final to Beau, a semi to Lisa Ashton and two to finalist Mikuru Suzuki.  Not too Chablis, even consumed out of a brown paper bag…

Last weekend, two USA ladies had themselves some kind of weekend.  Had either wanted to go flying on Halloween evening their mode of transportation would have a chauffeur in full livery.

The Witch City in Nashua, New Hampshire, saw Cali West win both women’s singles.  The ’01 singles had WDF ranking points.  West defeated Paula Murphy 5-3, but this still leaves her behind Murphy in the WDF rankings.

In the cricket event West took Marlise Kiel 2-nil in 67 darts.  Danny Lauby Jr. added WDF points with a 6-1 win over Jay Waugh.  Lauby’s the #1 ranked Yank with a WDF Lakeside Championship invite in the offing.

Sandy Hudson was not afraid of the Ghost on the Coast in Myrtle Beach as she was the one that said “BOO”.  Sandy was scary good taking both the ladies singles and ladies cricket doubles.  Alex Spellman, on a Beau Greaves-type roll, won both singles, men’s cricket doubles, mixed doubles and triples.

Congrats to Darin “Big Daddy” Young as he emerged from a shootout with Leonard Gates to capture the cricket singles in Nashua.  Gates opened the proceedings with a 17-darter.  Young drew level when he ended it (278-220) with T15 and T20.  Young pulled ahead in score (368-287) but had some pies open which Gates used to close at 368-353.  Gates needed 3×15 plus one more to win.  He got 3×15 but left Young the chance to close it out with a single 15.  He did.

What’s the chances of the ODC mentioning cricket?  As likely as a cowboy riding Bodacious’ for 8 seconds.  Darin Young, like Larry Butler, is one of the Golden Age of Darters who is still going strong.

It was mentioned that the bull Bodacious “was nasty and loved hurting.”  Just to be clear, BEAU-DACIOUS is not nasty, but she does like laying a hurt on competitors and sending them away from the oche shaking their heads looking for another pint.

Stay thirsty my friends.


  • Howie Reed

    Astute, often controversial, and always humorous, the Old Dart Coach, Howie Reed (a former rodeo cowboy and advertising executive), is heralded as the Dean of Darts Chroniclers - the most prolific and widely followed writer ever about our sport. He goes back decades with the legends and knows where the skeletons are buried (just ask any of the ADO and WDF old-timers!). Here are four well-known facts about the Old Dart Coach: 1) he is a Republican, 2) he loves the ladies, 3) he can drink most anybody under the table, and 4) he throws darts as bad as Dartoid.