Dartoid’s Column

June 1, 2000
Column 90
Gobsmacked!

I think Steve Brown’s got it in for me. I don’t know why.

Once, I suggested that he could run faster than a snake. I’ve since spoken to him about this and he’s assured me he took no offense. In fact, he claims he read this comment as complimentary. …

June 1, 2000
Column 89
Miami, Florida

If you’re looking for the best darts bar in Miami, and possibly the whole of south Florida, all you have to do is fly into Miami International Airport and drive around the corner. Tom’s NFL Club (5001 NW 36th Street) is so incredibly close to the terminal that, …

May 1, 2000
Column 88
Darts Philanthropy

There is simply no question that I am going to win the honkin’ $325 million jackpot tonight when the numbers are drawn in the super seven-state Big Game lottery. Due to a bizarre convergence of factors, I am so absolutely certain I am going to rake in the …

May 1, 2000
Column 87
Williamsburg, Virginia

There’s a nasty rumor floating around that yours truly has something against the electronic game. That this rumor, in fact, does exist was confirmed recently in a conversation I had by way of another modern invention, the telephone, with Leslie A. Murphy.

Leslie is Executive Director of the …

April 1, 2000
Column 86
Hanoi, Vietnam

One of the dumber things I’ve done in my life occurred almost thirty years ago, the night a ping-pong ball with my birthdate on it popped out of a bin. To “celebrate” several buddies and I sort of rearranged the interior of a bar in downtown Kalamazoo, Michigan. …

March 1, 2000
Column 85
Good-bye “Mr. Bean”

It’s been some six years now that I have been writing this column. My subject has always been darts. Today must be different.

For those of you who follow this page and who might occasionally find reason to smile in my words, please forgive me this one …

February 1, 2000
Column 84
So You Want to be a Darts Millionaire?

I nearly puked the night before the Super Bowl. I turned on Regis Philban’s new show to be blasted with a full HOUR of questions dedicated to professional football trivia. Yuck! But THAT wasn’t what nearly bought my shoes my lunch. What …

February 1, 2000
Column 83
The Coin Toss

When one considers the lengths that the average darter will go to when searching for something — ANYTHING — to give themselves an advantage in our sport, it is downright mysterious that one of the most critical aspects of the game has, so far, escaped special scrutiny. …

January 1, 2000
Column 82
The Mother of All Parties

My plans for welcoming the new millennium were set twenty-six years ago in Kalamazoo, Michigan. In fact, when the beer ran out and as the sun began to cast its glow across the snow on the first morning of 1974, my room mates and I …

January 1, 2000
Column 81
Beware of Dogs Bearing Notes

It’s been a week now since my wife left town. Marylou, always organized, shipped her shoes ahead in a big box and then hopped a flight to Houston. Her sister lives there. They were gonna go shopping. Probably for shoes.

My dog, Colby, and I …