Dartoids World

Column #HR351 ARACHNID BLOCKBUSTER TV EVENT!

Thursday, June 30, 2022
Column HR351
ARACHNID BLOCKBUSTER TV EVENT! 

Arachnid has concluded an arrangement for a TV event on ESPN in August in Rock Hill, South Carolina.  With $20,000+ up for grabs, this invitation-only event will be broadcast August 5th at 11:00 pm Eastern time on ESPN.  With some details still to come, the field will probably be made up of 32 invitees, playing double elimination 501, O/I D/O split bull (real dart format!) with the winner taking home $10,000, $5,000 for the runner-up and $2,500 for 3rd and 4th.  Each invitee will pay $200 dollars which should guarantee their attendance.  Upon arrival they’ll receive $300 dollars with the extra $100 probably their appearance fee.  Now, back to the regular column…

SWIRLING, GALLOPING CONTRAVERIES AFOOT! 

STOP THE PRESSES!  Swirling, galloping controversies are afoot – our English cousins pronounce it “CON TRAV IS SEE.” The Old Darts Coach continues to work with them in hopes they can enter the 21st Century using the language as Yanks improved it.  They’re teachable.  They now drink beer cold and no longer call a cigarette “a fag.”  Hope springs eternal.

Controversy in darts is bad – even worse if it’s swirling, galloping and afoot.  A viewer of the recent World Cup thought he heard someone say, “Once the referee calls the score it stands even if the dart falls out without being touched.”    

If ever you’ve turned on the news and heard a despot from a country explain why they bombed a children’s hospital you’ve heard, “In accordance with UN rules 251.38 and 295.67 b-8 c3.”

So, the ODC will direct the reader to 5.4 scoring and sub rules 5.4.1 to 5.41-8.  The short answer?  Nothing has changed.  The player must “touch the dart while it in the board.”  So sayeth John Part which is fine with the ODC.    

QUEEN SHERROCK 

Another controversy on darts social media, which is seldom social, concerns Fallon Sherrock – labeling her place in the World Series of Darts as a publicity stunt.  “She doesn’t belong.”  The PDC is about putting asses in the seats and eyes on the telly.  They’ve done a great job.  Why Fallon Sherrock?  She plays well, is attractive and handles interviews with grace.  Oh yes, she’s 27.

The PDC lifted dart players from exhibitions scrubbing for £20 pounds during a Tuesday lunch to making £100,000+ per year.  Before the PDC the only person driving a Rolls Royce was the Olly Croft of the BDO.  It’s the ODC’s opinion the women’s game of darts is as much fun to watch as the men.  Sport’s is a movie where you think you know the ending but don’t.

Take the semi-final match last weekend between Aileen de Graaf and Fallon Sherrock.  Sherrock led 2-1 and was on 40.  de Graaf leveled with a T28 finish.  At 4-4 de Graaf erased 102 for the win.  That’s good stuff, Maynard.  Women’s golf and tennis have moved on from” We can beat men.”  They promote their sports with great success.

Will Sherrock be the best in the afternoon at Blackpool on July 24th?  To be determined…

The PDC 2022 Betfred World Women’s Matchplay field includes the top 8 ladies from the PDC Women’s Series.  The winner picks up £10,000.

(1) Lisa Ashton vs. (8) Chloe O’Brien

(4) Aileen de Graaf vs. (5) Laura Turner

(2) Fallon Sherrock vs. (7) Katie Sheldon

(3) Lorraine Winstanley vs. (6) Rhian Griffiths

Lisa Ashton, a former PDC tour card holder, dominated the series winning 7 titles from 8 final appearances.  Fallon Sherrock clocked in with a pair of wins with Lorraine Winstanley winning the final event to secure a place in the Matchplay.  If the July 24 event is successful (i.e., asses on the seats and eyeballs on the telly) the PDC has the next step.  Maybe take these 8 ladies and insert a match each week in the Premier League.  Just a suggestion.

While the PDC ladies were doing battle in Barnsley the CDC set up business in “Oh Canada!” for a triple header.  No surprise that guys from the Land of “Hockey Players and Whores” (Oh, what position does your sisters play?) swept all three events.

Jacob Taylor handed Danny Baggish a loss in event #4.  Baggish led most of the way including 5-3 just two from the “W”.  Taylor would grab 3 in a row in 19, 15 and 16 darts including a T35 check.  Baggish got level in 15 with 86-out.  In the decider Taylor wanted 118 as Baggish sat at 69.  When Baggish couldn’t covert Taylor used 5 to eliminate 118 for the 7-6 win.  Baggish had a higher average for whatever that’s worth.

In event #5 – what drama (pronounced DRA MA) was in the semi match between Leonard Gates and #4 winner Jacob Taylor as he went for the daily double.   It was one of those “I got it you take” with neither player leading by more than 1 leg.  Both players yielded legs they had chances to win.  Gates got the 7-6 win after he missed 3 at 26 followed by Taylor missing tops at the end of a 119 try.  The final was a blow out when David Cameron opened up 2-0 which he stretched to 4-1 with a pair of 13 darters that begat 5-1.  Gates would get to 3-7, then Cameron fished off in 15 darts.

The final event of the weekend matched David Cameron against Leonard Gates in a “wing ding doodle” of a semi.  Cameron built a 3-2 lead, then went ballistic as he took three in a row – all in 15 darts.  Down 6-2 the Soldier fought back with his own attack taking 4 in a row to level (at 6) forcing a decider.  During Gates’ run he dominated to the point that Cameron only had chances for a double in one leg.  Going first Gates scoring deserted him as he had only two triples but still had a shot at a 116 out missing double tops.  Cameron’s scoring was slightly better allowing him a shot at bull from 121.  When Gates missed tops Cameron took out the 25.

In the final, Cameron opened a 5-1 lead over Matt Campbell, cruising to a 7-2 win.

So (back to the beginning), ESPN will soon be adding another premier sporting event to their lineup that now consists of Stair Climb, Frisbee Football and the ever-popular Coed Corn Hole.

Machine dart’s bells and whistles keeps the kids and cats happy.

Stay thirsty my friends.

Author

  • Howie Reed

    Astute, often controversial, and always humorous, the Old Dart Coach, Howie Reed (a former rodeo cowboy and advertising executive), is heralded as the Dean of Darts Chroniclers - the most prolific and widely followed writer ever about our sport. He goes back decades with the legends and knows where the skeletons are buried (just ask any of the ADO and WDF old-timers!). Here are four well-known facts about the Old Dart Coach: 1) he is a Republican, 2) he loves the ladies, 3) he can drink most anybody under the table, and 4) he throws darts as bad as Dartoid.