Dartoids World

Column #HR432 HANGOVER

Monday, October 11, 2023
Column HR432 

In his younger days, the Old Dart Coach would wake up on January 1 with a terrible hangover caused by too much aiming fluid and group tighter (and also, soon to be forgotten New Year’s Resolutions).  It’s the same following a WDF World Cup…

This time, the hangover was not as serious as the PDC came to the rescue like a Bloody Mary on New Year’s morning (with the World Grand Prix).  The ODC loves the double start of the Grand Prix that sends the PDC’s professionals into a dither.  Poor babies.

In his last column the ODC didn’t emphasize the importance of the ladies of Ireland capturing the World Cup gold in the 4-person team event.  They defeated Sweden in the semis 9-6 and Wales in the final 9-7.  Wales’ 7 legs won in a losing cause can be credited to two ladies – Rhian O’Sullivan (4) and Eve Watson (3).  The rest of the Welsh team had only 3 doubles in a single leg.

The ladies from the Emerald Isle (Robyn Byrne, Katie Sheldon, Caroline Breen and Aoife McCormack) all contributed with at least one win each.  They became the first team other than England and Netherlands to capture the Women’s 4-person title.

Also lost in the total World Cup kerfuffle was the remarkable accomplishment of “The Queen” Deta Hedman.  Her first world cup appearance was 1991 some 22 odd years ago (although some were even).  She won her first gold in pairs in 1995 partnering with the “great” Mandy Solomons.  Then there was a gap until 2013 when Deta took the singles and pairs with Trina Gulliver.  This year, she notched a pairs win and singles runner up to Beau Greaves (where she led 3-2 and 4-3).

The “Queen” muses, “I have to ask myself do I want to put myself through another 2 years of battle to qualify for Seoul.  I’ll be 65 years of age.  No doubt the aches and pains will be worse than ever”.

She’ll be back to give ’em hell in Seoul in 2 years.

Deta continued: “I would say to the knockers this really is a fantastic event to attend, playing for my country is the greatest honor in our sport”.

The ODC was somewhat surprised that “knockers” could talk.  The WDF World Cup is the greatest event in darts and the “Queen” is not only a great player and great person but also the best Ambassador for the world of darts.  Hopefully, she’ll play in 10 more World Cups.

If there’s a “Queen” Deta how about a “King”?

The ODC pleads “nolo contendere” – as that title goes to Paul Lim.  He’s about the same age as the “Queen” and appeared in his first World Championship in 1982 – and he’s still going strong.  Just last weekend he finished top 8 in the highly competitive PDC Asia Championships.

Both Paul and Deta put the Timex watch to shame as they keep ticking along.

The ODC’s latest New Year’s Resolution (already forgotten) is to stop picking on the WDF.  Doing so is akin to harvesting “low hanging fruit”.

The WDF just concluded its premier event.  During the playing of the World Cup and afterwards not a single post celebrating the event appeared at the WDF website.  Nothing.  Zilch.  Instead, there was a post about the “Toto Dutch Open Registration” (the event is to be held in February), “Beau Greaves (playing) at Lakeside this December” and “73 players (that) qualified for the Lakeside Cocktail Party” (and when that draw for the event will be made).

Greaves said, “Winning the World Championship last year was one of the proudest moments in my darting career and I want to defend that title.  That’s why I’ve chosen to play at Lakeside”.

Nice try.

Beau gets £25,000 for the expected win.  At the Ally Pally, Beau would need to reach the 3rd round for £25,000.  Beau’s absence will have no effect on the Ally Pally.  If the WDF hierarchy thinks this is a game changer they are delusional.  That’s a given.

Many have heard the saying “Always the bridesmaid, never the bride” and those that follow the PDC know this has fairly described Luke Humphries.  He plays brilliantly until the semi or finals, then folds like a cheap suit in a Bangkok downpour.

This time, Humphries turned it around – beating Gerwyn Price 5-2 in sets.  For the former Youth Champion this would be his first TV ranking title, a £120,000 payday moving him into fourth place in the PDC Oder of Merit, displacing Gerwyn Price.  How about that?

Gerwyn Price won the Grand Prix in 2020 but with two chances for a second win came up short.  He lost in 2021 to Jonny Clayton 5-1.  It’s oft mention by the loser in any match with sets, “Yes, but I won more legs”.  

That’s stupid.  It’s no different than saying “I won the argument with my wife.  I love the couch.”

Price lost in legs 19-11.  Therefore, Price’s post-match comments indicate that he took one too many blows to the head as a rugby player or he delusional – possibly a combination of both.

“I’m absolutely gutted.  I didn’t help myself early on.  Luke played fantastically and he’s a worthy winner.  I think I played better than him tonight – he just played really well at the right times.”  Whisky Tango Foxtrot.

Humphries outplayed Price in average (93 to 91), scores of T40 (17-13), scores of T80 (8-3) and highest checks (170-117).  In short, Humphries buried Price.  The ODC will take this opportunity to explain the game of darts to Mr. Price….

You are supposed to play well at the right time.  Of the 15 legs in Humphries’ column only 3 were over 17 darts.  Mr. Price – you got your ass kicked.

Price took the opening set 3-nil where Humphries needed 4-darts to start two legs.  Once Humphries had the “pesky opening double” problem solved he was on his way…

At 3-2 up, Humphries got his 4th set – when level at 2, and with the darts, he went T12, T80, T39, 54 and d8 finish in 13 darts.  Price was sitting on 18 after a T80.  The fifth set was won by Humphries 3-2.  Price never saw a double.

Humphries summed up his game with, “Regardless of anything else I’ve done in my career, that was the greatest game I’ve ever played in my life”.

The PDC Ladies Series this weekend.  Would the PDC be so petty as to ban Beau after she passed on the Ally Pally?  No. They couldn’t give a “fiddler’s bow”.

Stay thirsty my friends.


  • Howie Reed

    Astute, often controversial, and always humorous, the Old Dart Coach, Howie Reed (a former rodeo cowboy and advertising executive), is heralded as the Dean of Darts Chroniclers - the most prolific and widely followed writer ever about our sport. He goes back decades with the legends and knows where the skeletons are buried (just ask any of the ADO and WDF old-timers!). Here are four well-known facts about the Old Dart Coach: 1) he is a Republican, 2) he loves the ladies, 3) he can drink most anybody under the table, and 4) he throws darts as bad as Dartoid.