Column #HR82 Helen Scheerbaum and Paul Lim – Darting Treasures

Friday, December 21, 2012
Column HR82
Helen Scheerbaum and Paul Lim – Darting Treasures

Warning: Reading this column may be injurious to your mental health and may not be suitable for minors or the humor challenged.
According to the Mayan calendar the world is coming to an end on December 21. So… if you’re reading this after that date you’ll have proof positive that the Mayans were FOS.

Don’t expect the quintessential year-end effort. There’ll be no singing of “Deck the Halls with Balls for Holly” or “Walking Around in Women’s Underwear” sung to the tune of “Walking in a Taylor Wonderland.”

Which leads to one half-wit’s attempt at humor…

Reacting to the ODC’s last effort, on the Facebook page of a well known lady darts player he posted, “I haven’t been so happy since Howie Reed had a sex change operation.” The “humor challenged” should always think twice, if possible, then move on to playing with their Crayolas, trying to keep the colors inside the lines.

One who is definitely not a half-wit is George Silberzahan of the City of Brotherly Love. Philadelphia George took exception with the Old Dart Coach’s calling Kathy Karpowich, Kathy Maloney and Sandy Reitan the “Tremendous Trio.” Kathy Maloney’s coming out of retirement was the catalyst for that assessment. Her comeback at the Green Brier Bar in Pompano Beach, Florida was a success. She won the mixed pairs and ladies singles.

But back to George…

“What ‘Golden Age’ is it in which Helen Scheerbaum is not included? Could it be the ODC was in his cups?”

He took the safe approach for explaining the ODC’s transgression – that “the ODC was in his cups.” Pretty sure he was referring to drinking and not Maiden Form or Wonder. The ODC was relatively sober. “Relatively” being the key word. The ODC and Ms. Scheerbaum did share an adult beverage or two.

George is of course correct with regard to the late Ms. Scheerbaum. Like all good Philadelphia darters, Helen Scheerbaum was a fierce competitor. If she was in a bare knuckle fight with a 600 pound bear someone best have stepped in to help the bear. She was also just a little before the “Golden Age” but during her time she was one of the best – just not on the level with the Tremendous Trio. She was a true darting treasure.

Comments about a trip to Cleveland drew an overwhelming response.

“How many responses?”

“Two, but who’s counting?”

“I DO remember that weekend,” from Katy Hopkins who had to put up with both the ODC and John Kramer. Each week JK and Kate would fly from LA on TWA while the ODC took the same airline from San Francisco (maybe that’s where the sex change deal started). They’d meet in St. Louis. During one stretch the bartender in the TWA concourse got to know them very well. If one arrived before the other he would volunteer, “Your pals’ plane is late.”

Coming back from Cleveland late on a Sunday night to St. Louis the ODC fell asleep, exhausted from losing in the first round of every event save “bar.” Made the finals there every round. In those days you carried on your luggage regardless of the size…

The flight attended gently woke up the ODC, “Sir we’re in St. Louis.”

A groggy ODC picked up his bag thinking, “Boy this is heavy.”

Being the last passenger to de-plane, the ODC was “greeted” by a stewardess who was all out of “bye-byes”…

“We have to search your luggage.”

“What? Why?”

“One of the passengers saw you put a life raft in your luggage.”

“That’s silly. What the hell would I want with a life raft?”

In the ODC’s luggage was indeed an airline life raft. How did it get there?

JK and Kate had struck again. The ODC would get even with Kate when he stole her complementary chocolate from her pillow in a Houston hotel. He blamed the missing chocolate on the chocolate fairy who was in from San Francisco for a meeting.

“You’re not going to believe this. But I was sound asleep when this six-foot chocolate fairy came into the room. It was dressed in a black sheath dress, a simple string of pearls, and was wearing very stylistic Capezio shoes. There was nothing I could do.” She bought it.

Anne “Sleepy” Kramer let the ODC know that, “I still have that “little hopper!” – referring to the tiny hopping rubber penises used for the “Friday Night Hopping Penis Races” in Cleveland. What would draw a bigger crowd in Cleveland: the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame or Hopping Penis Races in a singles bar?

There will (probably) be no Hopping Penis Races in Las Vegas next year but for the first time in eons there will be two big-time darts tournaments. The New World Dart Series Par Duex (NWDS) on April 5-7 will be worth $32,000 with a single entry fee. It’s $10 cheaper if you’re a member of the NAPDPA. The singles of the NWDS will award points towards the Order of Merit North America (OOMNA) which will qualify someone to play in the PDC World Championship (PDCWC) which is a RBFD. WTF. “WTF” we all know means “With The Family.”

With the first round of the 2012 PDC World Championship in the books all the big names are still alive Via the computer at Justin TV, darters in the USA can watch the action live every day at 11 a.m. Pacific Standard Time which is not 11 a.m. in the in the East.

Canadian John Part advanced with a 3-0 (3-1, 3-2, 3-1) shellacking of youngster Joe Cullen. In the 9 legs he won Part had three ton-plus checks and a 56% finishing average.

Yank Darin Young drew Colin Lloyd for the second year in a row. Young took the first set as he did last year. Young, in fact, would take 5 of the first 6 legs. Two missed doubles kept that from being 6 of 7 and a 2 set to nil lead. Young would lead 2 sets to 1 but then have a “snyder” hung on him (3-0) as Lloyd leveled. The decider went overtime with Lloyd getting the 6-4 win. Young was only 37% in finishing and in the end that did him dirt. The bright side of the trip was he pocketed £6,000.

One first round highlight for the ODC was when Kim Huybrechts of Belgium eschewed a “man hug” from Scott Rand after losing 3-2.

“Way to go Kim!” he shouted.

All sports have stars that transcend their sporting abilities. Yes, they’re great and outstanding people. One could argue, and will, that list should include Michael Jordan, Derek Jeter, Peyton Manning and Phil Mickelson, to name but four. The ODC suggests that the name Leong Hwa, aka Paul Lim, be added to that list. His appearance at the World Championship stole the show. In a qualifier he beat Mahd Latif Sapup of Malaysia 4 legs to 1. That win set up a match with Michael van Gerwen.

Lim would lose 3-0 (4-2, 3-2, 3-2) but the match was much closer. Lim opened with a 12-darter and then took the second leg with the darts to win the opening set. Later, he would erase a 170 with three and celebrate. Unusual for Lim. The TV commentators opined that he was “celebrating the first 170 out of the tournament.” The ODC smiled knowledgably – figuring that Lim had bet on the 170-out. Lim displayed not only a high level of darting skill but a class found lacking in too many that call themselves sportsmen.

You can’t lie to the television camera. It can see into a person’s soul. What it saw in Lim was an honest, highly motivated, humble, exceptional person doing what he loves. If you look up “gentleman” in the dictionary there’s sure to be a picture of Lim. Anyone that doesn’t mention Paul Lim in the list of great dart players is a moron who’s opinion should be discounted. Phil Mickelson should be proud to proclaim, “I’m the Paul Lim of golf.”

Just one month after the Christmas of 1953 the stork and Santa delivered a late Christmas present to Mrs. Lim of Singapore. That present, Paul Lim Leong Hwa, is still there for the world of darts to enjoy and treasure. That’s something to be thankful for.

Merry Christmas from Toeing the Oche. Stay thirsty my friends.

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Howie Reed
The one and only Howie Reed (the Old Dart Coach) goes back decades with the legends of our sport - he knows where the skeletons are buried. Just ask any of the ADO and WDF old-timers! His widely popular column, Toeing the Oche, is a must-read.

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