![\"PatrickandBobby\"](\"http:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/11\/PatrickandBobby.jpg\")
Well duh \u2013 where the hell do you think the title of this column came from?<\/p>\nFriday, July 1, 2011
\nColumn 415
\nScoring for Show, Doubles for Dough. Bobby George\u2019s Darts Lingo.<\/b><\/p>\n
Okay, I admit it. I don\u2019t understand the British. I don\u2019t understand a fookin\u2019 thing they say. I\u2019ve tried. Honest I have. Now I\u2019ve even read a book that\u2019s supposed to explain it all. Ain\u2019t sure it helped a poo.<\/p>\n
I\u2019m not even sure I know what a poo is. Perhaps it\u2019s what Eric Bristow did after watching Keith Deller checkout 138 to take the world championship in 1983. He probably didn\u2019t even make it to the loo. Who the fook knows.<\/p>\n
To help me and others, the Man of Many Monikers (Glitter, Dazzler, Bling and Marie\u2019s Mandango), Bobby George, and the Doctor or the Gynecologist or the Professor (as George calls him), Patrick Chaplin, have co-authored a new book. Scoring for Show, Doubles for Dough<\/i> it\u2019s called.<\/p>\n
Well duh \u2013 where the hell do you think the title of this column came from?<\/p>\n
Released by Apex Publishing in June 2011, it\u2019s the only darts book ever written (out of all six published since Rupert Croft-Cooke handwrote the first on parchment) that\u2019s dedicated exclusively to the unique lingo of the sport.<\/p>\n
Blimey, I fookin\u2019 loved it!<\/p>\n
I read it cover to cover the other night whilst the missus (this is the lingo for what Bristow hoped Deller would do) was reading some literary crap by Charles Dickens. He can booger off. Or is it bugger?<\/p>\n
George and Chaplin are aces and so is their new book. Thanks to George it\u2019s funny. Thanks to Chaplin it\u2019s educational. And thanks to the economy it ain\u2019t dear (at about $13). Order it today at either Amazon<\/a> or Apex Publishing<\/a>. If you have great expectations you won\u2019t be disappointed.<\/p>\n I learned that Bed and Breakfast is what you call a 26. Funny that. I thought Bed and Breakfast was a synonym sort of thing for One Night Stand. It is in this damn country.<\/p>\n I learned that neither Bust nor Booby nor Top of the Leg is what I thought (or what apparently comes first to George\u2019s mind either).<\/p>\n I learned that Crawling Around is not the way one describes the aftermath of going pint for pint with Andy Fordham. The lingo for that is Comatose.<\/p>\n I learned that Cricket is a game we Americans ripped off from the British just like we \u201cnicked rugby\u201d and \u201cdonned protective gear\u201d so we \u201cwouldn\u2019t get our hair messed up\u201d and called it American football. Apparently the loser of a game of Cricket has to smash a bug with a wicket and chase it with a warm beer.<\/p>\n A Desmond is what we\u2019re supposed to call 22. Double two is Jews (in some Middle Eastern countries checking out this number, along with your self, earns a player 72 Vestal Virgins). Dinkey Doo is Cockney rhyming slang a single two.<\/p>\n Cockney slang is a sort of colorful way of associating an often not so obvious term to describe something that is obvious. An example that\u2019s not in the book but which is pretty much universal evolved from a simple reversal of syllables. If you grab a Bust, Booby or Top of the Leg before being invited a Knee in the Cock is what you\u2019ll get.<\/p>\n I could go on but I won\u2019t. I\u2019ve already leaped over the threshold of the Sexist Zone. Plus I\u2019m right knackered so I must toddle off anyway. Maybe I\u2019ll snag a shag and then have a fag.<\/p>\n Scoring for Show, Doubles for Dough<\/i> belongs on every darter\u2019s bookshelf. It\u2019s a great read and fookin\u2019 proof positive that neither George nor Chaplin show their writing to their wives or, if they do, ignore their edits.<\/p>\n Just as I have done here.<\/p>\n From the Field,<\/p>\n Dartoid<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Okay, I admit it. I don\u2019t understand the British. I don\u2019t understand a fookin\u2019 thing they say. I\u2019ve tried. Honest I have. Now I\u2019ve even read a book that\u2019s supposed to explain it all. Ain\u2019t sure it helped a poo.<\/p>\n I\u2019m not even sure I know what a poo is. Perhaps it\u2019s what Eric Bristow did after watching Keith Deller checkout 138 to take the world championship in 1983. He probably didn\u2019t even make it to the loo. 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I don\u2019t understand the British. I don\u2019t understand a fookin\u2019 thing they say. I\u2019ve tried. Honest I have. Now I\u2019ve even read a book that\u2019s supposed to explain it all. Ain\u2019t sure it helped a poo. I\u2019m not even sure I know what a poo is. Perhaps it\u2019s what Eric Bristow…","authors":[{"term_id":15,"user_id":2,"is_guest":0,"slug":"dartoid","display_name":"Dartoid","avatar_url":{"url":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/2024-02-13-12_01_31-Dartoids-World-_-The-most-widely-read-column-about-darts-in-the-world.png","url2x":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/2024-02-13-12_01_31-Dartoids-World-_-The-most-widely-read-column-about-darts-in-the-world.png"},"first_name":"Paul","last_name":"Seigel","user_url":"http:\/\/www.dartoidsworld.com","description":"\"Dartoid\" is the pseudonym of Paul Seigel, a prominent chronicler of darts for over 35 years. His columns are celebrated for their wit and insight, often detailing his quest for a game in exotic locales worldwide. His writing offers vibrant commentary on the competitive darts landscape, including players, organizations, tournaments and the sport's unique culture. Dartoid's articles are highly regarded among darts enthusiasts, solidifying his role as a pivotal figure in promoting and documenting darts as both a recreational pastime and professional sport."}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6610"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6610"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6610\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6497"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6610"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6610"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6610"},{"taxonomy":"author","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/ppma_author?post=6610"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}