{"id":5962,"date":"2022-03-31T09:50:34","date_gmt":"2022-03-31T09:50:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/2022\/03\/column-hr336-its-the-south-yall-but-first\/"},"modified":"2024-02-14T22:21:21","modified_gmt":"2024-02-14T22:21:21","slug":"column-hr336-its-the-south-yall-but-first","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/2022\/03\/column-hr336-its-the-south-yall-but-first\/","title":{"rendered":"Column #HR336 IT\u2019S the SOUTH, Y\u2019ALL – but first…"},"content":{"rendered":"

Wednesday, March 31, 2022
\n<\/strong>Column HR3365<\/strong>
\nIt’s the SOUTH, Y’ALL – but first…<\/strong><\/p>\n

When a Southerner says, \u201cWell, bless your sweet heart\u201d they mean \u201cShame on you. You are dumber than a fence post turtle.\u201d<\/p>\n

FREE ANA:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0Chuck Hudson, smarter than any fence post turtle, writes:\u00a0\u2026strange days we live in.\u00a0 A dude can keep his junk, identify as a female to compete in women’s sport. Meanwhile, the non-political, non-profit World Darts Federation can identify as political terrorists and ban Russians from their events for something they have no part in.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

The WDF\u2019s taken the extra step to be non-profit.\u00a0 They\u2019ve sold only 650 tickets for the first two days of their \u201cworld championship\u201d tournament which begins on Saturday April 2.\u00a0 The following Monday?\u00a0\u00a0A grand total of 200 of the 2,788 available.\u00a0 Bless their sweet hearts.<\/p>\n

Southern Canada\u2019s Kim Whaley Hilts has been a top darts player for some years.\u00a0 Now, she\u2019s overshadowed by husband Wally.\u00a0 He\u00a0did a Grammy worthy reedition of\u00a0the Keith Whitley song “When you say nothing at all.”<\/p>\n

Dedicated to Kim? \u00a0Check it out at\u00a0https:\/\/youtu.be\/q4SBxIocf8M<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Honey Muffin, Russ Lopez, has signed a contract with the Bottelsen Darts Company for a line of signature (both soft and steel) darts.\u00a0 Lopez, a many time Capped International for the USA, is a great Ambassador for the sport – and buys lunch.<\/p>\n

Now to Rotterdam, a province of South Holland.\u00a0 Ten thousand orange-shirted fans greeted Michael van Gerwen as he stepped to the oche against Michael Smith in the 4th<\/sup>\u00a0Premier League match of the night. The first three all ended in 6-5 scored.<\/p>\n

Peter Wright fell behind James Wade 3-1, fighting back to level at 4 and then 5.\u00a0 The decider was won by Wright when after he missed tops Wade followed but also missed tops on a 101 finish. Second time was the charm for Wright and a 6-5 win.\u00a0\u00a0 Jonny Clayton got a 6-5 win as Gerwyn Price missed only one finish – that tops from 106.\u00a0 Clayton took out 40.<\/p>\n

Joe Cullen came from 3-5 down to level Gary Anderson at 5.\u00a0 The decider just maybe lit a fire under Anderson\u2019s backside.\u00a0 He craved 77 as Cullen needed 312.\u00a0 \u00a0Anderson failed, having 6 to close including 4 from 40. \u00a0Cullen went T80, 58, then 74-out for the 6-5 win.\u00a0 Anderson has been known to get the “RA.\u201d This time he alleged that Cullen cheated.\u00a0 New nickname: \u201cGary \u201cThe Crying Scot.\u201d<\/p>\n

Michael van Gerwen jumped to a 1-nil lead which he never relinquished wining 6-5 over Michael Smith. \u00a0Smith did have a shadow of hope when he drew level at 5 in 14 darts.\u00a0 van Gerwen answered that in 13 for the win.\u00a0\u00a0Joe Cullen, who has yet to win, got to the finals in a match against Peter Wright that both would like to forget.\u00a0 The pair combined for 10 of 32 on the outer ring.\u00a0 Cullen used 13 for the 6-4 win.<\/p>\n

Michael van Gerwen broke on top 2-nil in the final.\u00a0 In time it became a 3-3 tie when van Gerwen leveled with a smooth 20-darter. \u00a0The next three went into the van Gerwen column in 12, 15 and 12 darts.\u00a0 Cullen then got the 6-5 win using 2 of his 7 T80s in the decider for 24-darter which should have been 12.<\/p>\n

The 317 darters at the 35th annual Virginia Beach Classic were in for a marathon with the cream of tungsten-tossers present.\u00a0 It was a Massachusetts Yankee, Ms. Carolyn Mars, who stole the show. \u00a0She opened with a 6-2 win over Liz Tynan in the women\u2019s pro cricket.\u00a0 Mars teamed up with Dustin Holt and Cody Willis to hang a 3-1 defeat on Stowe Buntz, Leonard Gates and Paula Murphy in the mixed trips.\u00a0 The leg lost by Mars & Company saw their opponent miss 9 doubles but still win the leg.<\/p>\n

Carolyn Mars teamed with Liz Tynan to take the women\u2019s ’01 doubles 2-1 over Paula Murphy\u00a0and Dani Warmack in a match that was pretty much devoid of scoring with only four scores of 100 (three of them Tons by Murphy).<\/p>\n

Paula Murphy, the Titian Tornado, was in full-gale force on Sunday when cricket took center stage.\u00a0 She was simply unbeatable going 19-0 (in legs) in winning the women\u2019s cricket singles 4-0 over Cali West.\u00a0 The women\u2019s cricket doubles was a replay as Murphy and Dani Warmack never dropped a leg, including the final where they bested Shea Cole and Bonnie Wei.\u00a0 On their way to the final Murphy\/Warmack scored a payback \u201cbitch slapping\u201d (as recently made famous by Will Smith) of Liz Tynan\/Carolyn Mars, who beat them in the ’01 doubles.<\/p>\n

Marlise Kiel broke the Mars\/Murphy domination when she won the ladies ’01 singles 4-0 over Brittany Edgett – where Edgett was denied any double.<\/p>\n

With a men\u2019s field jammed-packed tighter than a Tokyo subway with quality players it was Jason \u201cLet\u2019s Go Brandon\u201d who emerged the winner of the ’01 singles over 235 others.\u00a0 On his way to see Soldier Gates in the final he defeated Dustin Holt (3-1) and Danny Lauby (3-2).\u00a0 That loss temporally sidetracked Lauby’s chance at a singles double as he won the pro cricket 6-0 over Gates.\u00a0 Lauby would get that double with a 4-0 win in the men\u2019s cricket singles.<\/p>\n

In the ’01 final Gates set the bar high opening with the darts in 12.\u00a0 They would level at 2 when \u201cLet\u2019s Go\u201d checked 111.\u00a0 Brandon got the lead in 14 darts (T40, T34, T40). \u00a0Gates drew level using a T80 on the way to erasing 48, forcing a decider. \u00a0Brandon needed T60 to deny Gates a three dart shot at 70.\u00a0 Done deal and the 4-3 win.<\/p>\n

The South can celebrate the return of the of the Ghost on the Coast Tournament in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, after a 2-year hiatus.\u00a0 The prize fund of $25,000 includes purse, MVP awards and costume contest winners.\u00a0 It’s just happenstance that the date, October 28-30, is Halloween weekend.<\/p>\n

Heck, it\u2019s just like going to a PDC event.<\/p>\n

What\u2019s not to like?\u00a0 Beverages, darts and costumes with the chance of singing off key a distinct possibility.\u00a0 One can almost hear readers thinking of the ODC, \u201cWell, bless his sweet heart.\u201d<\/p>\n

Last but not least, a quick close today with Players Championship results from Niedernhausen, Germany, located in South Hesse.\u00a0 Gerwyn Price and Michael van Gerwen\u00a0scooped up titles.<\/p>\n

Stay thirsty my friends.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

When a Southerner says, \u201cWell, bless your sweet heart\u201d they mean \u201cShame on you. You are dumber than a fence post turtle.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":4149,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_eb_attr":"","_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"ppma_author":[17],"class_list":["post-5962","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-howie"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"views":730,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/darts-image-feature-random-27.jpg?fit=520%2C398&ssl=1","uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/darts-image-feature-random-27.jpg?fit=520%2C398&ssl=1",520,398,false],"thumbnail":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/darts-image-feature-random-27.jpg?resize=150%2C150&ssl=1",150,150,true],"medium":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/darts-image-feature-random-27.jpg?fit=300%2C230&ssl=1",300,230,true],"medium_large":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/darts-image-feature-random-27.jpg?fit=520%2C398&ssl=1",520,398,true],"large":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/darts-image-feature-random-27.jpg?fit=520%2C398&ssl=1",520,398,true],"1536x1536":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/darts-image-feature-random-27.jpg?fit=520%2C398&ssl=1",520,398,true],"2048x2048":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/darts-image-feature-random-27.jpg?fit=520%2C398&ssl=1",520,398,true],"rpwe-thumbnail":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/darts-image-feature-random-27.jpg?resize=45%2C45&ssl=1",45,45,true]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"Dartoid","author_link":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/author\/dartoid\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"When a Southerner says, \u201cWell, bless your sweet heart\u201d they mean \u201cShame on you. You are dumber than a fence post turtle.\u201d\u00a0","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"authors":[{"term_id":17,"user_id":4,"is_guest":0,"slug":"howie-reed","display_name":"Howie Reed","avatar_url":{"url":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/111howie.jpg","url2x":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/111howie.jpg"},"first_name":"Howie","last_name":"Reed","user_url":"http:\/\/www.dartoidsworld.com","job_title":"","description":"Astute, often controversial, and always humorous, the Old Dart Coach, Howie Reed (a former rodeo cowboy and advertising executive), is heralded as the Dean of Darts Chroniclers - the most prolific and widely followed writer ever about our sport. He goes back decades with the legends and knows where the skeletons are buried (just ask any of the ADO and WDF old-timers!). Here are four well-known facts about the Old Dart Coach: 1) he is a Republican, 2) he loves the ladies, 3) he can drink most anybody under the table, and 4) he throws darts as bad as Dartoid."}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5962","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5962"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5962\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6189,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5962\/revisions\/6189"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/4149"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5962"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5962"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5962"},{"taxonomy":"author","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/ppma_author?post=5962"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}