Friday, July 22, 2011
\nColumn 49
\nWorld Matchplay \u2013 Sixteen Becomes Eight<\/b><\/p>\n
While resting on the couch with viewing fluid in hand the Old Dart Coach actually broke out in laughter. Here he was viewing the current best 16 dart players in the world still alive in the \u00a3400,000 Sky Bet Mobile World Matchplay and he was laughing. What had shaken the old coot from head to toe, but not caused a drop of viewing fluid to spill, was a blog entry that appeared along side Justin TV\u2019s streaming of play from Blackpool.<\/p>\n
After listening to 5 days of commentators talking about professionalism the ODC had almost forgotten that darts was really fun. It was really fun in part because most of the regular players and fans were usually a \u2018bubble or two\u201d off plumb center. A male blogger in the midst of the dramatic match between Paul Nicholson and Raymond van Barneveld out of the blue posted, \u201cThe name Cheryl Crow gives me a boner.\u201d<\/p>\n
(Okay, he slightly misspelled Sheryl but \u201cC\u201d or \u201cS\u201d the results we must assume were the same \u2013 so lighten up. The same advice goes out from the ODC to the TV talk guys, Sid Waddell excluded: lighten the \u201cF\u201d up!<\/p>\n
\u201cNow that\u2019s a good ton-eighty.\u201d Huh? All ton-eighty\u2019s are good. Never seen a bad T80 in my life. This reminded the ODC of the time he was doing some announcing work up in Canada with Big Cliff Lazarenko. It was not a great week. During an exhibition at the Steel Workers Hall on Lake Orillia, Ontario Cliff was having one of those rare off nights. He wasn\u2019t helped much by a small crowd or the ODC\u2019s announcing talents which many thought thin. To close the show two ladies from the crowd, who had never played darts, were brought to the stage to play Cliff. The two ladies would each throw, then Cliff would throw. The ladies\u2019 scores would be added together. To make it more fun Cliff could only finish on double-double. The lady\u2019s somehow got the score to 50 as Cliff got to a double-double. The kindly-gray-haired-school-mom-type asked the ODC, \u201cWhat do I do?\u201d \u201cWell Dear,\u201d he said while walking up to the board and pointing to the red bull, \u201cYou throw the dart right here.\u201d \u201cI\u2019m not sure I can do that.\u201d \u201cSure you can.\u201d And she did. Dead smack in the center. The ODC disdaining any semblance of professionalism lost it completely as Lazarenko exited stage right.<\/p>\n
Now in such circumstances, when the star walks off stage, he is usually brought back by the announcer, who then waits off stage himself. The star then brings back the announcer after telling everyone what a great friend and announcing talent he is. The ODC did his part. Then waited in the wings\u2026<\/p>\n
Nothing. Not a mention.<\/p>\n
During the ride back to Toronto\u2026 not a word.<\/p>\n
During the plane ride to the Canadian Open in Winnipeg\u2026 nothing.<\/p>\n
The first event in the Canadian Open was the four person team. The ODC put his talent up for grabs. Three great Canadian lady players, two of which were Rani Gill and Carol Greenwood, drafted the ODC. Well actually there was no one else but that\u2019s a well-kept secret. Their first and last draw? The team of John Lowe, Bob Anderson, Cliff Lazarenko and and Keith Deller.<\/p>\n
The ODC was delegated to start for the \u201cThree Ladies and a Gent.\u201d In today\u2019s soft point game they would probably be called \u201cThree Oars and a Bore.\u201d He of course lost the bull. \u201cCliff to throw first.\u201d Three perfect darts in the triple 20. \u201cOne-hundred and eighty!\u201d<\/p>\n
The ODC toed the oche, shaking like a dog passing a peach pit. He was playing the big stars of darts. He toed the oche, took a dead breath, drew back his arm, took aim and threw.\u201d One problem \u2013 he forgot to let go of the dart. It hit his foot. Lazarenko jumped on the little miscue like a NBA player on a Kardashian.<\/p>\n
\u201cOwie\u2019s excited. He\u2019s never seen a one-hundred and eighty before.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNot lately \u2018cause I been with you the last two weeks.\u201d
\nThe first liar never stands a chance.<\/p>\n
THINNING THE HERD<\/b><\/p>\n
If you\u2019re a professional darts player you don\u2019t want to either open the show or bring down the curtain on a days\u2019 playing. Just like in show biz the opening act says, \u201cOkay, make that last trip to the loo and stock up on liquid.\u201d The last act is called a \u201chouse clearer.\u201d During the playing of the second round of the Matchplay those first and last matches were really good.<\/p>\n
Wednesday opened with a match of former \u201camateur\u201d champions at lakeside, Steve Beaton (1996) and Mark Webster (2008). Fact is the first four legs, split 2-2, were good. Those early legs saw 168 to set up 14 (Beaton), a missed bull for a 130-out (Beaton), a 168 to leave 134 (Webster) only to lose the leg when Beaton took out 140. Beaton would break serve with a 133 for a 5-4 lead. Going for the 6-4 lead Beaton would miss 3 at 36. Webster then tossed a 105 (60, 5, tops-check to level. Something changed at this point. Beaton seemed to lose one dart each trip to the line. Tied at 6 Webster took 7 of the next 8 for a 13-7 win.<\/p>\n
Adrian Lewis was in deep trouble against Kevin Painter in round one. That wasn\u2019t the case against Vincent van der Voort who he downed 13-6. The format here is: TV Commercials. They come after 5, 10 and 15 legs. Lewis took the first set 5-0. Lewis played good here but then van der Voot couldn\u2019t buy a double as he had a case of the \u201coffers\u201d as in 0 for 7. In the second set van der Voort won 4-1 to narrow the gap to 6-4. A \u201claugher\u201d turned into a nail biter for a bit. van der Voort stayed on stage during the break\u2026<\/p>\n
In retrospect, \u201cbad EYE DEAR.\u201d Lewis got a little something during the break. He took the third set 4-1 to build a 10-5 lead. Lewis won this one 13-6 and did it in spectacular fashion. Lewis took out 170 for the win. That\u2019s worth a bunch of cash if it stands up. It didn\u2019t. If Lewis stands up he\u2019ll also take home \u00a3100,000 cash. Lewis and Webster meet Friday at 5 AM Left Coast time. Take Lewis to win 16-11.<\/p>\n
The first three legs of the Simon Whitlock-Denis Ovens match were as good as have ever been played. Whitlock opened with T80, then T25 followed by a ton. Sitting on an 11-darter, Whitlock hit the bull but missed double tops. Ovens tossed in a T80 of his own to get to77. Whitlock hit the double. Whitlock also tossed a T80 in leg 2 but Ovens negated it with 60-125-83-T to leave 132. Whitlock got to 100 when Ovens \u201cturned up the heat\u201d with 25-57 the dead bull to draw level at 1. The third leg looked to be ready for the Ovens\u2019 column when Whitlock landed three-triple 18\u2019s (162) to leave 16. Whitlock took a lead he would never relinquish winning 13-1. Whitlock had a respectable 96.93 average with a double connect rate of 13 out of 25. This was one of those days when the \u201cheat wasn\u2019t in the ovens\u201d or as Sid Waddell said, \u201cIt\u2019s a del Shannon time match\u2026 A Running Away.\u201d<\/p>\n
Simon Whitlock will meet Andy Hamilton in the other 8 AM quarter final match on Friday morning. Hamilton won 13-11 over John Henderson. As honesty is the best policy it must be reported that the ODC fell asleep during this match. Andy Hamilton built an early lead of 4-1 when<\/p>\n
Scot \u201cRock \u2019N\u201d John Henderson put together a little run to get within 2 but double trouble attacked the rookie. Andy Hamilton averaged only 90.45 which is the lowest for a winner in the tournament. An in form Whitlock should have little trouble with Hamilton maybe winning 16-8.<\/p>\n
The evening session which starts at 11 AM Vegas time should be a barn burner. First up will be Raymond van Barneveld against James Wade. To get to the quarters Raymond van Barneveld had to \u201cput\u201d Paul Nicholson to bed. It was a match the crowd wanted. Just prior to the match the viewer was reminded of the Phil Taylor quote, \u201cHe\u2019s (Nicholson) got a big mouth and he won\u2019t shut up.\u201d The crowd had signed up for Barney\u2019s Army. First set of 5 \u2013 Barney took it 3-2. Nicholson tied it at 4-4 then faded. Barney overcame a T80 in the 9th with a 149 to leave 32 which he erased in three. The 10th leg was there for Nicholson but he \u201cjacked around with double top, after getting there with 20 and triple 20.\u201d Barney then erased 71. When Nicholson took leg 8 the crowd gave him a little \u201cBOO\u201d as he went after 40. He hit 20, nothing and then double 10. When he hit the winner he stuck his tongue out. Nice touch. When he lost the next two legs Waddell said, \u201cSometimes when you stick your tongue out you get it bit.\u201d Nicholson found the 13th leg to his liking. After Barney tossed a 180 to leave 120, Nicholson took out 164 (57-57-Bull) to draw level at 6. Nicholson got a lead at 7-6 but no answer when Barney took out 116 against the darts which was followed by an 11-darter of 180-125-140 then 16 and double tops for an 8-7 lead. From 11-9 up Barney took control thanks to some misses and some great play. The 22nd and final leg was UGLY. It took Barney 6 from 40 to hit the double.<\/p>\n
James Wade was the ODC pick to win the \u201cwhole shudrula.\u201d Prior to Wade\u2019s match with Mark Walsh he had only dropped 1 leg. That would change, as is sometimes his want, he gets the \u201cwalk arounds.\u201d Wade built a 3-1 lead with a neat 121 (60-25 2 x 18) check. That lead almost got to 4-1 when Walsh stole the leg with a T80 to leave 38 which he vaporized. Wade built a 7-2 lead which turned into 11-7. Then Wade got the \u201cstares\u201d as Walsh got to within one at 12-11 down. A Walsh win and it would go to OT. Against the darts Walsh got it to 61 with Wade on 122. No problem with 18-triple 18 and dead bull. Game over drive home safely. Go with Wade in the race to 31. Barney\u2019s too laid back.
\nThat leaves the match of the day. Wes Newton against Philip Douglas Taylor. Wes Newton beat rookie Justin Pipe 13-8 in a match that wasn\u2019t that close. Newton led from the first dart to the last which was a dead bull on the end of a 170-finish. Hitting the 170 means that he will split high out with Adrian Lewis. That bring us to one Phil Taylor.<\/p>\n
There\u2019s not much not to like about Phil Taylor\u2019s convincing 13-7 win over Wayne Jones. Those \u201caginners\u201d may bring up that he had a 5-1 lead which morphed into 5-4. Oh yeah, some though he wobbled a little on doubles. BFD. When building a 5-1 lead Taylor averaged 109-plus. He finished with an average of 108. Wayne Jones played well enough to win most matches averaging 97.89. There were some light moments that highlighted why Phil Taylor is Phil Taylor. In leg #17 Wayne Jones, with the darts, got 74 from 106 to leave 32. This followed Taylor\u2019s T80 which left 32. There is no argument but that Bruce Spendly, besides being a good referee, is one of the really-really good guys. As Taylor prepared to hunt down 32 Bruce said, \u201cWayne you require 32.\u201d Taylor stepped back, looked a Bruce with a smile as if to say \u201cBruce it\u2019s me Phil.\u201d Taylor then gestured to Bruce and turned to the audience, \u201cHow about him?\u201d Oh yes Taylor hit the double.
\nDown 11-7 Wayne Jones darn near took out 130 with the bull leaving himself with 25. Taylor was sitting on 124. The first Taylor dart found triple 20 for 60 which he followed with triple 14. Huh? Maybe he was going for the single 14 for a bull finish. Leaving 22 he hit the double 11. As Taylor walked to pick put his darts he \u201cput the finger gun to his head and pulled the trigger.\u201d He was saying as Mr. B. Bunny would \u201cWhat a maroon.\u201d \u201cWhat the heck?\u201d He followed with a winning leg that was pure Phil Taylor. T80-T40-T55 to leave 16 which went away with fat 8 and double 4. After he was asked about the 108 average and if he could improve it. \u201cI don\u2019t think I can get any better.\u201d Okay, and he should, why? Oh yes, he had \u201cbed hair.\u201d<\/p>\n
TALES OF THE ODC<\/b><\/p>\n
But first. Eric Bristow is just as opinionated as a darts commentator as he was as a player. Unlike Paul Nicholson his \u201cdarts were always able to cash the checks that his mouth wrote.\u201d His latest target was Scot Gary Anderson who despite 10 T80\u2019s went out to Andy Hamilton 10 \u20138. He averaged 98.04 but only connected on 6 of 21 outs. After the match Anderson said, \u201cI haven\u2019t picked up a dart in a month. I had friends visiting and couldn\u2019t practice.\u201d Eric jumped on that like a hog on corn. \u201cEvery time Gary loses he has an excuse.\u201d Bravo Eric.<\/p>\n
Recently the Old Dart Coach emailed the Grand Poobah of this web site to ask, \u201cHow come there are no posted comments if people are reading \u2018Toeing the Oche\u2019?\u201d Mr. Dartroid honestly answered that he had \u201cno idea\u201d but could confirm that he personally got \u201cuddles\u201d of emails after he posted a column. \u201cUddles\u201d is just a \u201ctad\u201d more than \u201csome\u201d or \u201cmany.\u201d The ODC can now rest as he received an email last evening. It came from someone who identified himself or herself as \u201cDart Pro 501.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou arrogant jerk. How the hell would you, a non-dart playing loud mouth drunken bum, ever get elected to the Darting Hall of Fame?\u201d The ODC sent the following reply. \u201cDear Dart Pro 501. The same way that Obama got elected President of the United States. I lied.\u201d<\/p>\n
Another e-mailer sent, \u201c\u2019Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.\u2019 Nice?\u201d Yes, must agree. I agree. I wrote it. It\u2019s a fact that many people have discovered the morning after.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
While resting on the couch with viewing fluid in hand the Old Dart Coach actually broke out in laughter. Here he was viewing the current best 16 dart players in the world still alive in the \u00a3400,000 Sky Bet Mobile World Matchplay and he was laughing. What had shaken the old coot from head to toe, but not caused a drop of viewing fluid to spill, was a blog entry that appeared along side Justin TV\u2019s streaming of play from Blackpool.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":4135,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_eb_attr":"","_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center 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resting on the couch with viewing fluid in hand the Old Dart Coach actually broke out in laughter. Here he was viewing the current best 16 dart players in the world still alive in the \u00a3400,000 Sky Bet Mobile World Matchplay and he was laughing. What had shaken the old coot from head to…","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"authors":[{"term_id":17,"user_id":4,"is_guest":0,"slug":"howie-reed","display_name":"Howie Reed","avatar_url":{"url":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/111howie.jpg","url2x":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/111howie.jpg"},"first_name":"Howie","last_name":"Reed","user_url":"http:\/\/www.dartoidsworld.com","job_title":"","description":"Astute, often controversial, and always humorous, the Old Dart Coach, Howie Reed (a former rodeo cowboy and advertising executive), is heralded as the Dean of Darts Chroniclers - the most prolific and widely followed writer ever about our sport. He goes back decades with the legends and knows where the skeletons are buried (just ask any of the ADO and WDF old-timers!). Here are four well-known facts about the Old Dart Coach: 1) he is a Republican, 2) he loves the ladies, 3) he can drink most anybody under the table, and 4) he throws darts as bad as Dartoid."}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5412","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5412"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5412\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6474,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5412\/revisions\/6474"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/4135"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5412"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5412"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5412"},{"taxonomy":"author","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dartoidsworld.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/ppma_author?post=5412"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}