Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Column HR54
The ADO Caved to a Cabal of Ego-driven Dictators
Long before the Old Dart Coach was the ODC he was a grad student at San Jose State College, now San Jose State University. Interesting that, he attended both Oregon State College and San Jose State College and once he left each became Universities.
The term “student” is used in the broadest sense. He attended enough classes to maintain a “B” average and stay in school while wiling away the dark hours at either Lenny’s or the Awful-Awful. Once he and the crew he worked with were fired from their hashing jobs at a sorority – for finding free meals were also on the agenda. They were fired by the Housemother who they called The Bulldog (which alone might have been a cause for their dismissal). Some claim that missed hook shots with dinner rolls toward the box over the stove did them in. On more than one occasion the missiles landed instead in the cooking pot filled to the brim with the next day’s tomato sauté.
This was of course before he was the ODC. At that time he was the Beach Ball, or Beach, a tag stuck on him by some very cruel fraternity brothers. You all know how cruel young people can be. He figured out that the best way to score a free meal was to show up at any sorority just prior to lunch looking for a game of bridge. In the ODC’s case the less popular the sorority the more chance of a game and a free meal. He was a lousy bridge player but that didn’t seem to matter. To his credit he did read the first chapter of the ultimate book on bridge by Charles Goren. He learned that if you have a bad hand but wanted to play you bid a club – “A” Club, not one Club. “A” Club meant you had garbage but wanted to play. Then you’d leave it to your partner to bail you out. If you were loaded you went straight to game at 7 Hearts.
The World Dart Federation (WDF) and the American Darts Organization (ADO) have bid “7 Hearts” with an “A Club” hand. Having stacked the deck, to say nothing of their elections, they always come out on top. Their scandalous action in regard to Stacy Bromberg and the upcoming World Cup seems to have been conceived, planned and executed by Paul Joseph Goebbels, oh he of the big lie.
JUMP SHIFT
Another term used in the game of bridge is the “jump shift.” That’s when you go from A to Z leaving out the 26 letters in between. For male darters that’s like picking up a first-time date, being complimented on your cologne and saying “So you wanna screw?”
Stieg Larsson is a Swedish author who became a world wide name, after death, when his book “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” hit the top of the charts. The heroine – that means star lady person – of the book is named Lisbeth Salander. She is a genius at what she does, withdrawn, sullen, quiet and not very likeable by most. She’s the catalyst that makes things happen in the book set in Sweden.
Could Stacy Bromberg be the Lisbeth Salander of darts? Could she be the catalyst for change? Probably not but she’ll damn sure make a try. She’s unlike Salander as you would never describe her as withdrawn, sullen or quiet. She’s a genius on the oche and disliked by some but, like Salander, couldn’t give a “rat’s patootie.”
Salander has a savior in a journalist – we are such a noble bunch – named Blomkvist. He believes in her and her abilities. In Larsson’s book, Blomkvist, appearing on a Swedish chat show, is asked, “How is it possible that civil servants in the Swedish government will go so far as to commit murder?”
Just replace the words “Swedish government” with the “WDF Executive”.
Blomkvist’s answer would be as follows: “The only reasonable explanation I can give is that over the years the (WDF Executive) has developed into a cult in a true sense of the word. They became like Pastor Jim Jones. They write their own laws, within which concepts like ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ have ceased to be relevant. And through these laws they imagine themselves isolated normal society.”
The Chick Chat Show host asks, “It sounds like some sort of mental illness?” Blomkvist answers, “That wouldn’t be an inaccurate description.”
JUST THE FACTS…
As Jack Webb used to say when he visited our living rooms as Joe Friday on Dragnet, “Just the facts, Ma’am.”
The fact is that a World Dart Federation rule reads, “They (players) must also actively play a majority of their competitive darts within the systems created and approved by WDF Member Dart Bodies.” WDF President Roy Price playing Pinocchio to Dave Alderman’s Geppetto decreed, “As you can see WDF Member Darts Bodies is a plural. This is because it is intended to refer to events within the WDF Ranking System.” He dug the hole deeper when he wrote to Bromberg, “Only tournaments included in the WDF World Ranking Systems can be included.” Price affected a “jump shift” here with no basis in fact, logic or reason.
Lest some may have forgotten Pinocchio was a “mythical” story character created by Carlo Collodi. He was carved out of wood by a woodcarver named Geppetto. Although made of wood he dreamed of becoming a real person. “Pinocchio is often a term used to describe an individual who is prone to telling lies, fabricating stories and exaggerating or creating tall tales for various reasons.” Sounds like the WDF President Roy Price who unfortunately is a real person.
Gibraltar has emailed, “Roy Price has already lost all credibility. The rules are clear and events created and approved by the member darts body do indeed count. There is no requirement, nor has there ever been for a player to play a single WDF ranked event to be eligible for selection. As long as they play the majority of their darts under their member darts body they are eligible. Roy Price of course knows this, but decided to invent his warped and deeply flawed interpretation of the rule to suit his own agenda. He should also stop blaming Gibraltar for this mess. This is of his own creation and he is a victim of his own intransigence. Having dug a hole for himself he just kept on digging. Under his warped ruling only about half the players are eligible. Under the actual rules they all are, including Stacey Bromberg and the Gibraltar player.”
Gibraltar also claims that their player, Dylan Duo, is being singled out because he is a member of the Professional Darts Players Association (PDPA), “…despite the fact that PDPA membership per se is not outlawed by WDF rules.”
The late Will Rogers was once quoted, “When you find yourself in a hole… quit digging.” Guess Pinocchio Price didn’t get the memo.
ODC MEA CULPA
The term “mea culpa” is a Latin phrase that translates into English as “my mistake” or “my fault.” In the popular vernacular the expression ‘mea culpa’ is an admission of having made a mistake by one’s own fault (one that could have been avoided if the person had been more diligent). As the ODC has a bunch of them maybe they can be called “mea cupas”.
Straight away he wants to apologize to King Oily and the Acolytes (WDF Executive) for even suggesting that this entire brouhaha was part of the ongoing battle between the BDO and the Professional Darts Corporation, a battle which may be at an end anyway due to the recent removal of the BDO board. The ODC in print has suggested that the rule “play the majority of darts in WDF Member Bodies” was just a backdoor method by the BDO to eliminate any PDC players. The PDC provided for the old guard BDO what Viagra does your average older dart player. Heck they ought to be thankful. The ODC was wrong. Why?
Under Pinocchio Price’s’ strict interpretation England’s’ World Cup youth player Jake Jones would be ineligible for the World Cup. Since January 1 of this year young Mr. Jones has played 8 Professional Darts Player Association events, the last being Saturday, September 3. Maybe no one in the WDF Executive noticed.
Also probably on the “do not enter list” would be Rowby Rodriguez of Austria. He played in the PDC youth event on May 14th and then a WDF ranking tournament on June 25-26. In the later he played youth and singles. But as the youth event doesn’t carry WDF ranking points it wouldn’t count. So he would be 1-1 which we’ve learned isn’t a majority.
The biggest apology from the ODC goes out to ADO president and WDF vice president Buddy Bartoletta. The ODC wrote that Stacy Bromberg was “booted off the team.” Mr. Bartoletta emailed to dispute that characterization. The ODC then made sport of Mr. Bartoletta’s response. The ODC wrote, “Booted stands as written.” Doing his due diligence, the ODC admits he’s wrong. Kind of…
Now read the next paragraph very carefully…
The WDF coordinator (by the way, “co” in the strictest interpretation, which we know is Mr. Price’s forte, means “with” – hence begging the question: Who is the WDF Ordinator?), Mr. Dave Geppetto Alderman, wrote to Gibraltar, “Several teams have been amended due to the issues raised by yourself in respect of some named players – in particular Stacey Bromberg who has been withdrawn from the USA team. A borderline case under the rules but nevertheless she has been withdrawn.”
As Artie Johnson use to say on Laugh In” Verrrry interesting.”
But who “withdrew” Stacy Bromberg’s name from the American World Cup team?
Could it have been ADO President Buddy Bartoletta? If so, on whose authority?
Did he consult with other members of the American team?
Did he consult with other members of the ADO Executive?
NO EYE DEAR, as Mr. Bartoletta has been unavailable to answer recent email queries.
In all fairness Mr. Bartoletta was in a difficult situation. Had he pointed out that WDF Price was 100% wrong in enforcing a stupid “mythical” rule and refused to remove Bromberg then the ADO team would have been left out of the World Cup draw.
Some would write BFD which was the term used back in the day before WTF.
To be fair, Mr. Bartoletta, a member of the WDF Executive, couldn’t very well refuse to remove Bromberg because as we know from Mr. Price’s e-mail to Bromberg, “I (Price) then contacted the remainder of the Executive (minus Olly Croft) who all affirmed that they agreed with the path we had chosen.” As he (Bartoletta) agreed with the ruling he had no where to go.
Mr. Bartoletta did ask if the World Cup could count. Price emailed, “I told him it could not count. All events in the current calendars (WDF and PDC) year are counted up to but not including the World Cup.”
Excuse me! An event held the day before the World Cup counts but the Cup doesn’t?
Price goes though more gyrations in an attempt to justify his asinine rulings than Lyza the Philippine contortionist aka the Manila Folder.
It should also be noted that ADO president Bartoletta and vice president Ms. Laurett Meddis run or own two of the five WDF-ranked tournaments in the US and get BDO sanction for both. While the effect of such a sanction could be questioned from a financial standpoint it darn sure can’t hurt. One could see King Oily and the Acolytes removing those sanctions – although with a fresh wind blowing in the BDO things could change.
AND FINALLY
What can be done?
Well, in the case of the World Cup nothing. The WDF Executive has the final word. With the WDF AGM AFTER the World Cup the die has been cast.
Gibraltar should of course cancel their WDF tournament and instead run the “Monkey Rock Open.”
American dart players of all stripes should be outraged. Whether Stacy Bromberg is prepared or equipped to play the Lisbeth Salander part in this drama is up in the air.
There’s something American players can do but probably won’t. With two WDF tournaments scheduled to be run on U.S. soil during the remainder of the 2011 darting year, men and women darters should refuse to pay the $2.00 “sanctioning fee”.
They should just let it be known to both Austin, Texas (October 8) and Colorado (October 15) that they won’t enter the singles or pay the $2.00 WDF surcharges.
Similar to Alfonso Pedoya line in Treasure of Sierra Madre, “Badges? We don’t got no badges! I don’t have to show you any stinkin’ badges!” the American player’s refrain should be, “WDF ranking points? I don’t need no stinkin’ WDF ranking points!”
No North American player, either male or female, regardless of ability has a snow ball’s chance in hell of getting in the top 10 of the WDF rankings.
Why then does it make sense to contribute maybe $2,000 dollars a year in surcharges to an organization that tells you who can represent you? They tax you but represent themselves. Starve the beast!
A smart tournament director will advertise NOT WDF APPROVED.
Some might argue that smaller tournaments need the ADO sanction and the accompanying $2.00 surcharge. Fair enough.
But in this instance the ADO has NOT stood up for the American darter but rather caved to a cabal of ego-driven dictators.
Perhaps some day in the future Stacy Bromberg might show up to play in a new darting shirt with “Loews” on the back and carrying a violin case. Perhaps, like Lisbeth Salander in the final scenes from The Girl Who Kicked a Hornets Nest, Bromberg will pull from her case, not a stringed instrument but instead a nail gun – and then use it to peg the bad guys to the floor with ten penny nails.
Probably not…
But if so… for the first time in history an American darter would be taking control of his or her own destiny. Dealt an “A Club” hand from a stacked deck they’d turn it into “7 Hearts” which, lady’s and gentleman, is a grand slam.
Recently a pal of the ODC attended a wedding with his former dart playing wife. The groom, probably feeling the bubbly, proposed the following toast: “As I start married life I ask all married men to join me by standing next to the one that has made their lives eternal bliss.”
The bartender was crushed by the stampede.
The ODC’s pal? Still standing next to his wife. Age brings wisdom and fear.
Possibly there is a lesson here for the WDF and the ADO?
